Story of a Girl
by i-love-cardcaptors
Summary: She was in love with her best friend, who was right in front of her. But he's leaving ... will it be too late when she tells him how he really feels?
1. Confessions

**Story of a Girl**

**Chapter 1**

It was a hot summer morning. It was January 1 2005. NEW YEARS DAY. Sakura Kinomoto really didn't care. I have never cared about anything in the world. She woke up to the beeping of her alarm clock; I still use one because I'm always late for my appointments. Then I heard the phone ringing _"God that's for Aiko again!"_ the phone always rings and it bugs me to hell.

Aiko my older sister by 3 years was one of those "POPULAR GIRLS". She was going out with a basketball player from school. I didn't get it, like what's the point. A girl goes out with a boy and suddenly she gets popular? I had never had a boyfriend and I really don't mind, I liked being by herself, not lonely.

I opened the door and I found my sister talking off at the phone, saying things like 'Oh my god, really? Or that's sweet', like all that mushy stuff, it made me cringe. I didn't like Aiko's boyfriend, he was such a dick. Makoto Mayers tried to be nice to me but I just didn't care.

I walked to the kitchen and saw my mum cooking something, like a cake. Why couldn't she just cook something normal for breakfast? Her mother Akina said 'Good morning darling'

'Hi mom', sitting at the dining table and I asked 'What's for breakfast?'

'Just cook something for yourself, or have toast, remember you're on a diet, just watch what you're eating'.

She was right I was on a diet, but I hated it. I was a bit overweight, but I made progress losing 3 kilos in the first month, which would sound slow, but that's how I work.

'Are you going somewhere tonight?'

'Yeah, I'm going out with some friend ... Sakura can you help me mix this?' I stood up from the dining table and walked there.

I helped her mother mix the cake mixture 'Are you going to leave us any?'

'Yeah'

Her dad just woke up and he was in the backyard cleaning something up. I really hated her dad. Only if I could swear to him I would, so loud that he would get the point. But he was those kinds of dad that goes insane when you saw something wrong, or do something wrong. My dad was always on the computer and that's what he does. Eat, go to the computer, toilet, sleep, that's pretty much all.

Today I was planning on spending my day with my bestest friend in the world, Syaoran Li. I've known him since we were born; we used to be next door neighbors until he moved to another suburb. I took a shower before leaving and when I got out of the toilet my sister was going crazy and I said to her 'Screw you Aiko'

She pushed me out of the way 'Just move Sakura'

'Good morning to you too'

I never got along with my sister because she was just a bitch. I hurriedly got changed because I was running late to meet Syaoran who was in Blacktown Station. We were planning to just go out and watch a movie or something. I rushed outside running to the station and I found Syaoran smiling at me and he said as I was walking normally to him 'You're late again, what happened to your New Years solution?'

'Shut up Syaoran , so where are we going?'

'The City, I heard that Amusement Park was done and we could go there if you want'

'No, that's boring you know I hate theme parks'

'I was wondering if you wanted to try something new, come on', we got on the train and they sat next to each other and passed the other stations.

While we were on the train, a group of guys were looking at me. I thought to myself _"Why can't they look at themselves?"_ I whispered to Syaoran 'Those guys are freaking me out'

'You want to move?'

'I don't mind, I just don't like the way they're staring at me'.

I took out my IPOD NANO and we started listening to songs. We had the same taste in music and that made things easier for us. I put it on _Yellow card –Gifts and Curses_.

Finally when were in the city, they walked out together and it was busy. I said 'Let's go a shopping centre'

'I don't want to go there'

'Come on'

He finally gave in and he said 'Just as long as I don't have to help you pick anything'

'Your gay, Syaoran , come on I just want to get a milkshake'

I got something from gumballs and I enjoyed it, I offered some to him 'You want some?'

'No thanks'

We saw a photo booth and I asked 'Can we do one?'

'Sure'

They got in and put money in and he said 'Do the first one as a nice one'

They posed for the first picture well and we posed well. I had to admit we looked cute together. He looked at me in a way and I have never seen that look. I asked 'Is anything wrong?'

Smiling at me 'I met a girl during Christmas Sakura'.

I stopped hearing what he told me and asked 'Who is it?'

'A girl younger than us, she's in Year 9 this year, she's a great girl'

'Why didn't you tell me earlier?'

'Would that have made a difference?'

I admitted 'No, but I'm your best friend, I've known you forever and when you like a girl I expect to know that', I started walking away and at the corner of my eye.

He asked me 'Why are you being like this?'

'Like what?' I said

'Your being like this, the normal Sakura that gets jealous'

'I love you'

I saw Syaoran stop when he was about to say something when I said those 3 words. He asked repeating what I said 'You love me?'

'It came out wrong Syaoran ', I tried lying to my only best friend but I knew he knew I was lying.

'Why didn't – uh', he was too shocked to say something, instead I started walking away. He went after me and he asked 'Why are you just telling me now?'

'I don't know, we're too different Syaoran , I mean our relationship is different from everyone, if I told you, its would ruin everything', I avoided looking him in the eye.

He walked beside me and it was an awkward feeling. I could feel this tension between us. I apologized to him 'I'm sorry'

'I'm the one that should apologize, you just a – lets just forget about all this'

I thought to her _"But I don't want to forget the feelings I have for you"._

I felt the air starting to get sticky so we went inside the restaurant in case it rained and Syaoran said something to me that surprised me 'I just want you to know that I used to have feelings for you, but that was a long time before'

'I know, I could tell you felt awkward around me sometimes'

We sat down and I looked at him, he looked a lot better years before. We used to go into the forest when we were younger and just swim there. But things were different between the two of us. Even though it only has been 20 minutes, it felt like I admitted my feelings for him ages ago.

I don't know what to do now; it felt like he didn't want to be around me anymore and to make it worst, I felt awkward around him. It was Naoko Reynold's fault, and I was blaming her, but I had to admit I did most of the bad things.

So school was starting in two days, I didn't know if I wanted to talk to him. I wanted to call him so many times but I didn't know what to say, there wasn't much I could say now, just for things to calm down.


	2. Back to School

**Chapter 2**

Students were starting to go back to school and it was so hot. Some girls at school were having their skirts so high that they looked like slut, but all I could think about was Syaoran . What if I saw him? Or worse what if they were going to be in the same homeroom, I just wished I didn't see him today? As I walked through the school gates, I saw my sister walking with her boyfriend Makoto who was holding hands.

I started walking to my year designated area and I saw some new faces around. Then when I was walking to my friend Takara I bumped on this guy. This was a bad start for my day and I said to him 'Watch it'

The guy smiled at me and said 'Sorry, I'm Ryu Eba. I'm new this year'

'I don't care just move out of my way', though I thought he was pretty cute. I continued to walk to my friend Takara who was sitting with her boyfriend, Yuki. They had been going out for a while now and I thought they looked pretty good together. He was in the basketball team and he met her when she was walking out of his game, he came up to Takara and they talked from there.

Yuki said 'Its good to see you Sakura, but you don't look so happy'

I smiled at Yuki and sat beside Takara who looked so happy 'I'm actually not talking to Syaoran . I think I said something to him that I regret now'

Takara curiously asked 'What did you say to him?'

'I told him how I felt but I think he took it the wrong way', looking around the area, I wanted to see Syaoran to see if he was allright, but instead I saw him walking with Naoko who looked happy. It had been 2 weeks ever since I last talked to him.

Takara looked at Naoko and she said to me 'You know I told you to tell him earlier but I guess you never listen Sakura'

'Its too late now, they're probably going out'

'You still have a chance'

Yuki' friends came over and took him away. But he kissed Takara before leaving, they were such a happy couple, then I asked 'So did anything happen during the holiday?'

'Actually yeah something did', there was something about the way Takara said those words.

I asked 'So what did happen', eager to know what happened, not much happened to me this holidays, just bored sitting around and I got this new game that I couldn't stop playing till I was bored with it.

'Well we went on a road-trip for the weekend and we enjoyed it. He wanted to but I told him that I wanted to wait, and he respected my decision. That same night he also told me he loved me and I told him that', smiling brightly at me, she was so happy.

'I wish I was you. I want to know the feeling of being loved'

'Well its looks like you have a chance, that boy you bumped onto earlier can't stop looking at you since you came here', I looked at what Takara was talking about, and she couldn't help but blush.

'How could I possibly like him, look he's already hanging around the popular people', I looked at Syaoran and Naoko walking around happily. I thought to myself _"Why can't I stop thinking of Syaoran ?"_

Their Year Co-coordinator settled them into our homerooms and I was in my friend, July's class. I walked to my homeroom and I saw Ryu and I thought to myself _"He is pretty cute"_ Their homeroom teacher this year was Sensei Shina Hiroshi, she was a new teacher this year and she looked like she couldn't control the class. So everything was settled that morning, I was given my timetable and this year I was doing IT and Japanese as side subjects.

I went to my next period I though to myself _"This is going to be such a long year"_. The teacher came in the room and I saw Ryu running into my IT class. He sat next to me and he smiled. He didn't talk to me all lesson which I was pretty happy about, then after that period it was recess and he walked to me after class and said my name 'Sakura'

I stopped and turned to him and asked 'Yes?'

'I wanted to say sorry about earlier'

'You already said that to me earlier if you can't remember', I was acting all snobbish in front of him, and she didn't know why.

'I was wondering, since I'm new; why not show me around the school?'

'I'm busy so sorry'

'You think I'm a dickhead don't you?' I smiled at him, its like he could read my mind.

'Sorry, its just I usually don't talk to guys likes you'

I started walking and he walked beside me, I could smell his spray and it smelt amazing 'Guys like what?'

'Guys like you, that's in the basketball team or something and they're all that and popular'

'How do you know I'm going to be in the basketball team?' he wondered how she knew.

'I've heard about you, how you're good', he smiled at me and I smiled back at him.

'What about if I give you a first good impression again? I'm throwing a party by the beach this weekend; I'd really like it if you come?'

'Don't expect me there; I really don't like parties'

'So do I but please?'

'I'll try?'

'Is that a yes?' looking at me and I couldn't help looking in his green dreamy eyes.

'Yeah, look I have to go. Guess I'll see you around', I looked into his eyes and he bent his head and kissed me in the cheeks.

'Yeah I'll see you around'.

I couldn't believe that just happened and I was so shocked. I mean this gorgeous guy just kissed me when I'm one of those girls that just don't get kissed. I went to my next period and I found Syaoran sitting by himself and the sit next to him would usually be mine, but not today. I don't think I'll ever talk to him, well not for a while anyway. I sat away from him but I could feel his eyes on me, I knew him too well and I expected this kind of behaviour from him. So I got through that period all right, but the problem was after class. Syaoran could out my name 'Sakura!'

I turned around waiting for him to catch up with me 'What?'

'I've been thinking about what you said on the holidays and I understand how you feel'

'No you don't, your just trying to make me feel better but its not going to work this time. I've seen the way you look at Naoko, are you guys going out or something?'

'I would tell you first and no Sakura, we're just friends, I told you that before'

'I don't really want to do this right now Syaoran , I told you I didn't want to talk about this anymore, do I have to explain myself again?'

'No but I just want us to be friends'

'I can't do that'

'Yes you can, just put all this behind us'

'I already told you I can't do that. Look I have to go somewhere... so if you want to say anything else says it to me now'

'Where are you going?'

'I'm trying out for choir'

'You hate singing'

'I guess you just never knew me well'

'Sakura look you don't have to change, I understand your angry at me, but this can't go on'

'You should have thought of that earlier before you said …'

'Exactly I didn't say anything to you, you just expected me to be – don't worry I'll let you go', Syaoran watched me walked away and right there I felt guilty. He was right he didn't say anything, its just I feel awkward around him and I know he feels the same way. I just wished I didn't say anything to him. Only if I could turn back time.

For the next couple of days, it was awkward for me seeing Syaoran around. But I started befriending Ryu, he was actually a really nice guy and I was starting to think about the question he asked me days ago about a party, I might actually come. I could tell by the way he was looking at me yesterday last period in Maths, he looked at me.

After that class, and it was Friday, Ryu went up to me and he smiled at me, 'Hey'

I smiled back at him and said 'Hey'

'I was thinking, uhh… this might sound crazy but I can't stop thinking about you'

'What do you mean?'

'I like you a lot, but I know that your kind of having a situation with your best friend right now and I'll leave you to it, but I just want to ask you a question'

'Go shoot'

'Can I take you out maybe this weekend or I guess anytime that your not busy?'

'What about your party, remember?'

'I would cancel it for you, so will you?'

'I'll think about it'

'Here's my number if you change your mind', writing down his number in a scrap paper.

'Okay, so I'll see you around Ryu', I started walking away smiling to myself. Even though a lot of guys has asked me out before I didn't always say yes.

That night I called Ryu's mobile and he answered it, he said 'Hello?'

'Its me, yeah, I'm saying yes to that date you asked me'

He smiled and said 'Okay so what do you want to do?'

'Anything will be fine, so where will I meet you?'

'I'll be by the Blacktown Station around 9?'

'Yeah that sounds good'

'Look I have to go, so see you tomorrow at 9'

'Bye'

The next morning I woke up so happy and I got changed quickly so that I could meet Ryu on time. But as always I was 10 minutes late because I couldn't find my contacts, so I ran around looking for it. When I found it I quickly put it on and my dad asked me 'Where are you going young lady?'

'I'm going to the library'

'Okay but don't take too long remember we are going somewhere tonight'

I walked to the station and as I got closer I saw him and he was smiling at me, I stood in front of him and he said 'Your not late, don't worry I just got here'

'So where are we going?'

'I don't know, you want to go to the City?'

'Sure I haven't been there for a while', he bought the tickets so that we could get on the train and I sat down first and he sat next to me.

'You look good'

'So do you', I looked out the window and he asked me a question.

'So what actually happened between you and Syaoran ?'

'Well, I really don't like talking about this, but okay I'll tell you …uh it was around New Years and we went out as friends. He told me he met someone over the holidays and I asked him who. I told him how I felt about him but I guess he never felt the same way as me, so I got angry and stopped talking to him'

'Gee that's a bit surprising you don't look like the type that gets angry'

I smiled at him and said 'If your trying to make me feel better its not working'

He smiled at me and he took my hand and he held it , then he asked 'Did you make it in the choir?'

'How do you know about that?'

'Well I was walking to the fields and I saw you in the music room and I thought you tried out?'

'I got in'

'Good', his mobile rang and I wondered who that would be, I waited for the phone call to end.

'Who was that?'

'Just my mum, she's coming in a couple of days because my parents are separated so yeah'

'Does it matter to you?', he looked at me and his eyes were so hypnotizing.

'No not really I'm kind of used to it'

'Ryu I just want you to know that our relationship might be complicated, the girls in our year might make up stories about me because they hate me'

He whispered in my ear 'Don't worry I'll never listen to them'

When we got to the City, they were holding hands and his hand felt so good. The weather was perfect, everything was perfect. He looked at me and asked 'Are you hungry?'

'No not really?'

'You want to watch a movie now?'

'Sure why not?'

'Okay', they walked to a Hoyts Cinema and started looking around wondering what they could watch. I asked him 'What about Match Point?'

'Sure …', he was such a gentlemen and he paid for everything, even down to the popcorn. We tried finding seats that would give them privacy so they went near the back. He looked at me before the room started getting darker and he whispered to me 'I heard this is a good movie'

'Me too'

We enjoyed our time together and he whispered so many cute comments at me, we started playing around and luckily the movie wasn't very long so we still had a lot of time left. When we got out of the cinema I saw a passport photo booth and I wanted to ask him but I didn't want to sound like an idiot, but he could read me so he was the one that asked me 'Sakura do you want to go in there and take some pictures?'

I smiled at him and said 'Of course'

We posed for a couple of shots and we looked so cute. We took about 3 sets and I kept 2 sets and he kept a set. He asked me 'What time do you have to go?'

'Um I'm going to a party tonight, so I would have to be home by 5'

'Okay, come on there's one more place I'd like to show you'

They went to the ferry area, he bought a ticket and he got in the ferry, but I was behind him and he never knew I was scared of ferries. He went back to the land and asked 'Hey what's wrong?'

'I don't like ferries', he smiled at me like he was about to laugh.

'Come on, nothing is going to happen, I'll be here', holding his hand out and waiting for me to take it.

I took a step forward and took his hand and I took a firm grip, I was not in the ferry and I was still so nervous. When the ferry started moving forward I stood next to him and I was scared. He took my hand and hugged me, and whispered to me 'Your safe, just relax', for a moment there I forgot that I was afraid of ferries because I felt so safe in his arms. He also smelt so good, I could smell the aftershave he had on. I turned around and smiled at him and I said 'I don't think I'm scared anymore because you're here with me'

'That's good to know', he took my hand and held it.

We continued talking till we were back in land and we looked at the time. It was around 3.30 and I needed to get back home in time. So I said to him 'I better start going'

'Okay, I'll drop you home'

'Okay', we talked in the train and today were the best day of my life. I don't think I'll ever forget it.

He started walking me home, and I stopped him when it was near my house. I didn't want to get in trouble so I said 'We better stop here, if my dad sees you, he'll go crazy'

'Okay then, I'll call you tonight and I'll see you at school'

'Yeah okay', he kissed me in the cheeks and he started walking away. I walked in the house and my parents were starting to get prepared for the engagement party we were going to tonight for my cousin Sumi. I went upstairs and everything was already ready. I put my handbag down and started putting my lilac dress on, I had to look formal tonight because Sumi was one of those popular cousins that expected a lot. I put mascara on and that was all I put, I hated putting a lot of make up, it just looked disgusting. I heard someone knock on my door and I said 'Come in', it was my mum who came in with a box of jewellery.

'I want you to wear this tonight'

'But I don't want to'

'Come on Sakura be nice', I gave in and took the box and started putting the necklace and the earrings on, then I did my hair again to make it match with the earrings.

We got to the engagement party and when Sumi had a moment with me alone, she asked me 'So where's Syaoran , how come he's not here tonight?'

'I'm actually not talking to him. I mean I want to but its just too complicated now'

'What happened?'

'I don't want to talk about it?'

'Did you eve notice that he might actually like you but he's trying to avoid it'

'What are you talking about?'

'I'm telling you that he likes you, by the way he looks at you'

'Its too late now anyway, I'm going out with a guy now', that caught Sumi's attention.

'Who is it?'

'A guy named Ryu'

'Is he cute?'

'He's hot and he's really nice', I saw her fiancée, Hiroshi who started walking towards Sumi 'I think I should go, your fiancée is coming over here'

'Talk to me later Sumi'

'Okay'

'And wait, I want you to be my maid of honor', I was shocked.

'I thought you were going to ask my sister?'

'No, come to the practice next weekend allright? And bring your friend'

'Okay, I'll try', I hugged Sumi and Hiroshi kissed me in the cheeks before I left.

Later on that night on the way home, my mobile rang. It was Ryu, I couldn't answer my phone right now because everyone would be listening so I ignored it. Aiko said to me 'Why don't you answer your phone?'

'Its nobody', Aiko took my phone and saw Ryu's name and she asked me 'Who's Ryu?'

'No-one give me my phone back'.

'Tell me who he is?', I took my phone from her.

'Mind your own business Aiko, don't you have a boyfriend to talk to?'

'He's away for the weekend'.

When we got home I rushed upstairs and my phone was ringing again and I answered it and he said 'Hey?'

'Sorry I couldn't answer your call just then I was in the car and my parents were around'

'How was it?'

'It was good'

'I was calling wondering if we could go out again, next week, maybe Thursday?'

'I have choir practice and it ends late'

'I have soccer practice too, maybe I'll wait for you then we'll go?'

'Yeah okay, wait I was wondering, my cousin wants to meet you, can you come with me?'

'Are your parents going to be around?'

'No don't worry'

'Okay I'll come then'. We talked all night and he was so interesting to talk to. He told me that he wanted me to meet his parents but I was too nervous about all this.

On Monday, I was dropped off to school by my dad and I went to the sports field and waited for Ryu to finish. I was early to school today and I could see Ryu practicing hard. He got into the soccer team and he was very happy about it. When he was done, he walked over to me, I smiled at him and said 'Hi'.

He kissed me in the cheeks and said 'Hi, I would hug you right now but I'm sweaty'

'Go take a shower, we'll just talk during lunch'

'Allright'

'I'll just go now', he looked at me and he walked off.

During recess, I was in the library doing my homework and Syaoran sat next to me and disturbed me, I asked him 'What are you doing here Syaoran , I told you I don't want to speak to you anymore'

'Sakura why would you risk our whole friendship just because I didn't admit that I had feelings for you', he looked so serious as he said that.

'You had feelings for me?'

'Yeah I did but I know you and you just wouldn't hear me out'

'Its too late now Syaoran , I'm going out with someone else'

'Oh you mean Ryu? You didn't even tell me about him?'

'Its none of your business now'

'Get away from me Syaoran '

'I love you Sakura and deep inside yourself you know that'

'Its way too late now Syaoran , I like Ryu'

'You just like him, you don't love him', Ryu came up behind Sakura and Syaoran looked at him.

'Syaoran what are you doing here, get away from her!'

Syaoran said 'I will, Sakura think about what I said'

Sakura gathered all her things and I ran out of the library with Ryu coming after me, he yelled out 'Sakura stop, I need to talk to you'

I stopped and I turned around and saw the look in Ryu's eyes, a look of jealousy, I asked 'What?'

'I want to know what he said to you'

'He told me he loved me, he was just too scared to what might happen', Ryu hugged me tightly 'I don't love him anymore'

'I know because I love you', I hugged him back tightly and he said 'I need to do this'

'What are you going to do? I wanted to know what he was going to do, I didn't want Ryu getting in trouble because of me'

'I want to settle all this, I don't want him to be near you anymore', I tried stopping him, but he was too strong.

During lunch while I was in choir practice I didn't know that there was a serious fight between Ryu and Syaoran , I didn't know. I only heard of it when my friend Takara came in the music room getting me from there and rushing me over to where the fight was. Both boys got in trouble and the principal also had a word with me, so there was the 3 of us in the principal's office about to get busted. Principal Jenkins said 'I'm ashamed of these, Syaoran , Ryu and especially you Sakura, why did this happen?'

I tried saying that I wasn't even there when all this happened 'Principal Jenkins I was in choir practice I had no idea this was happening'

Ryu said 'Syaoran wouldn't stay away from Sakura'

Jenkins said 'It's a school Ryu, what do you expect, everyone sees each other? This is your last chance, if this happens again, I will have to get you expelled, I've been giving you too many chances. I've read your report Ryu, you haven't been the perfect student not that I expect it. And Syaoran , out of all people, you know what to do, you walk away from this sort of stuff. This time I won't call your parents, but if this all happens again, then you know the consequences. Syaoran , Sakura you can leave, I want a word with you Ryu'

I stood up and so did Syaoran , and I stayed back for Ryu, while Syaoran walked away, I could hear Principal Jenkins yelling and giving Ryu a lecture. When he came out of the office, I asked him 'What happened?'

'I'm getting a months' detention'

'So you can't come this Thursday?'

'No I guess not, sorry about that', holding my hand and he kissed it.

'Don't worry about it'.

I rushed to music class and I couldn't stop thinking about what just happened. Syaoran was never going to talk to me after this incident but the worst thing was, inside I felt guilty. I was confused about this and I was starting to think if I had feelings for Syaoran , but that would be betraying Ryu when they had a good relationship. After school Ryu had to stay back at school and I took the bus home.

When I got home, something was different, the house was quiet and no-one was home. I called out 'Mum', then I looked around starting to panic and there was a message in the fridge saying.

_Your father is in the hospital and me and your sister is with him. Don't come to the hospital just stay at home, we'll be fine. Just pray for your dad. There's food in the oven and it'll keep warm, stay safe. Maybe you can invite Syaoran over to keep you company._

_Love you, _

_Mum._

I dropped the message on the floor because I was shocked. I couldn't believe that my dad just had a heart-attack, I called my sisters mobile and she answered it.

'Aiko what's going on with dad?'

'He collapsed this afternoon, I don't know why'

'How is he?'

'He's still in ER, Sakura I'm really scared for him, you can't come here, and someone has to be there tonight'

'Call me if anything big happens'

'Okay, bye take care'

'Bye'.

That night I really wasn't feeling like myself. I couldn't eat. I didn't want to eat. Syaoran called me that night when his parents heard about he news and he wanted to see if I was allright. The doorbell rang and I opened it and Syaoran was there standing in the rain and he asked 'Are you allright?'

'No not really', he came in and he hugged me tightly and I started crying in his arms.

'Its allright, I'll be here for you all night. Have you eaten?'

'No I don't feel like eating', I sat in the dining chair and I looked at him 'Why did you come here even though I said all those things about you?'

'Because we're friends, you were there for me for the worst and I'm going to be here for you?' I smiled warmly at him, he was a true friend.

'What about our feelings for each other we can't just forget about it'

'Just try not to think of it tonight', he sat in front of me and took my hand 'Your cold'

'I know'

'You want me to turn the heaters on?'

'No its allright'

I ate the food he heated up for me and he watched me eat. I was glad he was here tonight, it really helped me through the situation and he stayed all night in my place and when I woke up the next morning in my bed, he wasn't around anymore. I thought to myself _'I guess he went home this morning'_. I took a shower and the phone rang, it was my mum. She found out that my dad's situation is really bad, his heart is too weak for the body and he wouldn't be able to move. My mum told me that she was going to stay there all week, and that Aiko should be home around this time because she was going to school.

At school today, I was lifeless. I didn't see Ryu much today because he was always busy, but when he did. He saw me crying by the changing rooms near the pool area. He called out my name 'Sakura!'

I quickly wiped away my tears as he started walking towards me 'Hey'

He looked into my eyes and asked 'Are you allright?', sitting next to me.

'I'm fine', I didn't want him to see me crying, it was a bad sight.

He looked at me and asked 'Sakura come on tell me'

I looked into his eyes and I started crying in his arms 'Its my dad, he's had a heart-attack and my dad is getting worst by the day'

'When did you find out?'

'Yesterday afternoon and Syaoran came over'

'Syaoran came over?', starting to get angry 'I told him not to go near you and he's doing it'

'He knows what I'm feeling Ryu, we were just talking as friends'

'I don't believe you actually let him in'

'I needed someone to talk to'

'You could have called me'

'I guess you don't understand how I'm feeling and even though I wasn't talking to Syaoran it seems like I could confide in him more than you', I was starting to get really angry, and he was taking this all in the wrong way. I stood up and started walking out of the changing rooms and at the corner of my eye I could see Ryu was starting to regret the things he said.

'Look I'm sorry Sakura, I just get overprotective sometimes, but I want you to know when you need me in anything I'm here for you', though I was still angry at him. I was not going to talk to him; I needed a supported boyfriend but Ryu just wasn't it.

'I don't think this is going to work Ryu'

'What do you mean?'

'Ryu we're just too different and even if we haven't been together for long, I could tell that we're both two different people', I touched his hand trying to make him understand.

He stepped towards me trying to do everything he could to make this work, he looked at me and said 'Please, I'll do everything; I just don't want this to end'.

'It's too late now Ryu, I have given you a chance, I'm sorry I even said yes for the date you asked me'

'Sakura', holding my hand one last time but I took it and I started walking away. Though inside I regretted, I knew it was for the best.

Later on that afternoon after school I went to the hospital to visit my weakening dad. When I entered the room I realized that Syaoran was there and he smiled at me and my sister and my mother left he room leaving me and Syaoran alone with my dad. Syaoran looked at me and he said 'I heard about what happened between you and Ryu, I'm sorry if I caused it'

'No it wasn't my fault, he just wasn't there for me you know, and he was all agro about what I told him that you were over last night. He was going crazy'

'Can you ever forgive me?'

'It wasn't your fault Syaoran , I got angry at you and I should have been the one to say sorry', I looked at him and I looked away, my phone rang and it was Ryu. Lately he had been wanting to talk about the situation, but I surely didn't. I was annoyed of this now.

'Its Ryu isn't it?', Syaoran asked me that question when I wasn't answering my mobile 'You should answer, just talk through things with him'

'I don't want to'

He walked over to me and pulled back a strand off my face and he kissed me in the cheeks and said 'Just answer your mobile Sakura', I nodded at him and I walked out of that room. I answered my mobile and I looked at him one last time.

Ryu said 'Sakura can I see you this afternoon, tonight, I need to talk to you about this'

'Its too late now Ryu, besides I have to be here for my dad'

'I promise I won't be long'

'Allright, meet me outside of the hospital, don't be late, at 7.30'

'Okay, I'll be there'. I hanged up the phone and I went back in the room, I talked to my dad silently about all this. So much has changed. My opinion of my dad and I did not realize that I actually cared for him.

When it was around 7.20, I started going downstairs to meet him, but when I got there, I saw Ryu already sitting there and he looked worried. I said his name 'Ryu, why didn't you tell me you were here already?'

'I didn't want to worry you, look Sakura we've got a lot to talk about', I slowly sat next to him and he took my hand and he said 'I don't think we should end this here, please give me one more chance, I promise you I won't disappoint you'

I looked at him trying to read his thoughts but as usual I couldn't read them. I said to him 'I will give you one more chance Ryu but trust me this will be your last'

He smiled at me, he was so happy and he kissed me passionately in the lips for the very first time and his lips felt amazing against mine, he whispered to me 'I won't ever disappoint you'

'Okay', then that night I had dinner with him. Lately I had been eating out because my mum was barely around to cook for dinner. We talked about stuff and I couldn't believe that Ryu couldn't even live without me for a day. This is what I loved about him, he was crazy about me.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

2 months had passed and still my dad was still in hospital. My mum had been around more and more, but she was so sad about the whole situation. Meanwhile, my friendship with Syaoran has gone back on track and Ryu and me had an amazing relationship. He just told me that he loved me a couple of days ago when we were on a date. I don't know how I felt about him though, well I did like him, but I wasn't sure if I was ready to say the four letter word yet to him.

Syaoran tried out in the soccer team as one of the players got kicked out for having marijuana at school, which was against the rule. Syaoran eventually got in and it was allright for me now that Ryu and Syaoran was in the same team. I always thought that they got along, but I guessed wrong, but to prevent anything from getting bad, they stayed away from each other. Ryu got to be captain of the team and I was happy for him, but inside me I always got jealous because he was always surrounded by popular girls.

I was doing great at school and everything was allright. It was around April now and yesterday I realized that I lost 10 kilos from the beginning of this year. I was happy for myself. During lunch I was sitting with Syaoran and I could see Ryu with his other friends talking, laughing and goofing around. I could hear Syaoran saying to me 'You want to go out and watch that new Date Movie?', but I wasn't listening to him properly. I was watching Ryu and the girl next to him and she looked like she was flirting, that girls name was Oki, she was a cheerleader. I looked at Syaoran and he asked me 'What's wrong?'

'I hate Ryu having to be in the soccer team, he's always surrounded by those slutty girls', he laughed and I looked at Syaoran .

'Come on Sakura its not like he doesn't get jealous when I'm around you or when your surrounded by gorgeous guys', he was right, in my Math class I was always surrounded by hot guys but Ryu just never said anything about it, he was always quiet about those stuff. I stood up and he asked 'Where are you going?'

'I just need to go to the toilet', he stood up and looked at me and asked 'Are you sure you're allright?'

'Yeah I'm just, I'm fine', I started walking towards the girls bathroom, and I looked at myself. I asked myself _'What if I'm not good enough for him? He's always surrounded with those gorgeous girls? What if he's playing me, god I look like a fool'_, I saw someone come in the bathroom and it was Oki and she gave me a dirty as she started putting on more eyeliner. I walked out of there getting pissed at myself. Then I thought to myself _'What am I doing? I promised myself I wouldn't do this? Remember Sakura you don't care about what anyone says'_ Then I saw Ryu walking to me so I started walking to my lockers and he jogged after me.

'What's wrong? Have I done anything wrong?', that was the first couple of questions he asked me when he catched up with me.

'You've done nothing wrong'

'Tell me why your angry at me', he faced me then he knew what I was feeling 'Nothing is going on between me and Oki'

'What makes you ask that question?'

'I saw you looking at Oki and me at the corner of my eye. You can trust me, nothing happened'

'Okay', I felt him hug him and I hugged him back weakly, then I unconsciously asked 'Can you come to my place tonight, no-one's home?'

'Okay, what time?'

'Anytime', he knew what she might be planning and he was wondering why she was rushing all this. He was glad to wait because he wanted the moment to be special for both of them.

He tried making an excuse to get out of it 'I actually am going to a show with my parents Sakura, I'm sorry'

'Okay, I have to go'

'Allright, I'll see you after school', kissing her passionately before letting her leave.

That night I was alone in the house. My mum had stayed in the hospital and my sister was at camp and I had nothing to do. I already ate dinner but I was yearning for something to do, so I just watched the TV. It was thundering outside so I got the chimney to work and it was warm in the room and it gave this perfect lighting. Suddenly my doorbell rang and I went to the door and I saw Ryu who was dripping wet from the rain and he said 'I changed my mind'

I smiled at him since he looked to adorable wet 'Come in, I don't want you to get sick now'

He came in and he asked 'Have you got any dry clothes?'

'Uh yeah upstairs, just sit by the fire I'll be back'

'Okay'

I went upstairs trying to find some dry clothes for Ryu and when I went downstairs I saw him, he looked sexy by the fire, I sat next to him and gave him the clothes, but when he looked at me, I knew something was going to happen that night. He kissed me passionately but there was something about that kiss, it was different, then he got on top of me and we started making out right there. I was nervous about this, then he started unbuttoning my shirt revealing my breasts, then I said to him 'Take your clothes off, its wet'

So he did and he started taking off his shirt, his pants and left his boxers on, then he started kissing me by the neck and I thought to myself _'I don't want this to hurt'_, then I closed my eyes and he stopped, we were finally naked under that blanket that we were both in.

'Are you sure you want to go through with this Sakura, I don't want to do anything you don't want to do?'

'Yeah, and wait use a condom'

'Okay', he got one out of his wallet and went back under the blanket, put it on quickly and he was entering me and I groaned in pain and he stopped.

'Maybe I should be at the top?'

'Okay', he moved me up and I was on top of him now and I slowly entered him, and when I fully did I closed my eyes shut. It was so painful, then we swapped places then he started thrusting, slowly the pain started going away and I was starting to enjoy my time with him.

The next morning, I found myself in his arms and he was still asleep. I made the slightest move and that woke him up, he asked me 'You allright?'

'I just woke up, don't you have to go somewhere today?', I was wondering because it was Saturday and he usually has soccer practice.

'No not today, are you parents going to be home soon, I don't want to get stuck in an awkward moment?'

'No your safe, so was last night good?'

'It was great, really it was'

'I'm glad', he stood up and quickly got changed and I watched him. He had a nice cute butt.

'You know we're suppose to be going out today, so if you don't want to go anymore I'm fine with it'

I stood up enthusiastically and said 'Just wait I need to take a quick shower', then someone knocked on the door and I got worried, I whispered to Ryu 'Hide in the closet in case its my mum'

He quickly ran there and I quickly cleaned up the things on the floor, then I opened the door. It was Syaoran , 'Syaoran what are you doing here?'

'We were suppose to watch a movie remember?', coming in the house and something felt different 'Is anyone else here?'

'Ryu you can come out', then he came out of the closet 'Syaoran I forgot about that'

'Its allright we can go next Thursday if you want?'

'No I made you a promise we can go, so we're going Syaoran . Ryu you wouldn't mind right, I promised Syaoran ?'

Ryu looked at me weirdly before answering me 'Yeah its fine, besides we can go out tomorrow afternoon, remember the wedding?'

'Okay, I'll see you around', he kissed me passionately in front of Syaoran and when he left I just stood next to Syaoran .

'Did anything happen?'

'What do you mean?'

'If you guys had sex or anything?'

'Why would you want to know that?'

'Because he stayed over Sakura, you just don't invite people like that'

'He's the one that came over, lets just go'

While we were walking around Blacktown, I now felt weird around him. He was always annoying me about it. Its like he can't mind his own business. Then he finally said to me 'Okay I'll butt out of it Sakura, but I'm just worried about you, what if you get pregnant? Or if your parents find out, you know they're full against it?'

'I won't get pregnant we used protection'

'Sakura girls like you get pregnant for all reasons, I just want to take care of you'

'Don't worry about me'

'I worry about you because you're my friend and imagine if something bad happens to you, I just can't take it'

We watched a movie together and it was actually good I liked it. Today it was April 18, it felt like the year was going really slowly this year, but that's just me. I didn't know that the afternoon wouldn't go so well. Syaoran had to tell me something. He looked at me while we were eating lunch.

'I have something really important to tell you'

'What is it?'

'I'm moving', I could see that he was waiting for me to react.

'What? What do you mean your moving?'

'My dad got accepted in his dream job and we're moving'

'Why?' I was shocked by all this 'Why do you have to go, why can't you stay?'

'Sakura you know my dad, when he makes up his mind, its hard to change so please don't make this any harder'

'Why, you know your better than this Syaoran , what about what you want?'

'I don't want to go but there's nothing I can do about it'

'You can stay at my house, I just don't want you to go'

'I can't Sakura, I'll visit you some time I promise'

'When are you going?', I wanted to know, what if he was leaving tomorrow, I couldn't take that.

'In a month, my dad just told me yesterday and I knew I had to tell you'. I looked at him. I was really hurt about this 'I'm so sorry, but I wanted you to know'

'Its not your fault, where are you going?'

'Back to Japan, my dad wants to you know … learn there and his job is there'

'Are you sure that's all?'

'I'm sure, you know I would never keep anything from you', he looked into my eyes as if he was about to say something but he stopped.

'Syaoran I have to visit my dad this afternoon, can you come with me?'

'Yeah sure', he looked at me and he picked up all the rubbish and threw it away. I felt weird, as if I desperately didn't want him to go, but there was nothing I could do now. He was right about what he said earlier. When his dad makes up his mind, its hard to change. So I stayed quiet thinking of some ways to spend the rest of the month with him.

**  
**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

When Syaoran went home that night, he was in deep trouble. He was late again and his grandparents were having dinner with him tonight along with his folks. His mother, Nyoko Li, and his dad Kin Li were both annoyed.

Nyoko asked 'Where have you been, your grandparents are going to be here in any minute help me do the table'

'I don't even want them here'

She whispered to him 'Did you tell Sakura?'

'I did but I didn't tell her all the part, I don't think she's ready', his dad entered the room that looked presentable. Syaoran hated his grandparents, and they were royalties apparently.

_This all happened, just a couple of months ago, during the Christmas holidays. Queen Jane and King Rex were both spending Christmas together in the woods, like camping. They were newly weds, they were murdered brutally by someone and the FBI's were still trying to find the killer. So next in line that wasn't family close but were still blood related was Syaoran 's grandparents (Kado and Sachi), since they were too old to rule, Nyoko & Kin would be doing the job but not for very long, Syaoran Li would have to do it._

Syaoran didn't want to but he didn't have a choice and he didn't like leaving Sakura. He's never left her ever, but all that was about to change. The doorbell rang and he answered the door and greeted his grandparents.

Sachi said poshy 'It's good to see you again Syaoran '

'Yes young man, where is your parents, me and your grandmother don't intend so stay long here in Australia, the weather is terrible'

'There in the kitchen, dinner is going to be serve soon'

'We'll go in the dining room then'

5 minutes later, they were all sitting down eating and Syaoran was in the middle, listening to the grown ups talking about his future.

Kado admitted 'If you move now, there won't be a big problem later on when the press starts finding out'

Kin said 'We'll do it in a month, its not that easy just leaving behind everything we've owned'

'Well that's a deal, in a months time exactly I want you in Japan, in the palace straight away, meanwhile you young man are going to have Prince lesson, you've got to tidy up and I don't like that moustache you have'.

His mother said 'I will not let him be changed fully. This prince thing shouldn't have to change most of him'

'Its not a choice Nyoko', Sachi said.

The wedding was today, for Sumi and Hiroshi, and so far it hasn't been the best weather lately. My parents couldn't go so they didn't know that I was going with Ryu which was cool. The bridesmaid dress was hot and I heard the doorbell go off. I went downstairs and I opened the door and he looked good in a suit. I asked him 'You don't look that bad'

'In a couple of hours I will be', he kissed me passionately in the lips and he asked 'How was yesterday?'

'It went well, but Syaoran is leaving, in a month'

'Why?'

'I don't know, I have a feeling he's hiding something from me', I got in the car that was going to the wedding reception and he leaned on his shoulder.

When we got there, it stopped raining and it was allright now. Ever since Sumi met Ryu a couple of weeks ago. She liked him for me, which was good to hear, she saw us being in love and it reminded her of how she was with Hiroshi. Me and Ryu both went our separate way. I got a phone call from my mum. I answered it and it was her and she sounded like she was stressed 'Sakura I need you to come over to the hospital straight away'

'What happened, what's wrong?'

'Its your dad, he's dead'

'What do you mean dead?'

'He is, the doctors couldn't do anything about it'

'I'll be right there mum'.

I rushed to the hospital with Ryu still at the wedding because I didn't want him to know. Everyone in the hospital room was crying and tears started to form up in my eyes. This happened so quickly. I walked slowly to my mum and hugged her tightly. Her eyes were all red and I knew she had been crying she said to me 'I can't believe I wasn't here when this all happened'

'Mum you can't blame yourself there was nothing you could do'

'I know and I feel terrible about that', I pulled away and started walking to Aiko who was outside the hospital room.

'How are you doing Aiko?'

'What do you think?'

'I know I'm sorry for asking', for the first time I saw my sister crying and I hugged her tightly and I said 'I'm here for you'

'Thanks'.

A couple of hours later, I was at home and everyone else was in the hospital. I was sitting in the backyard and I heard someone walking towards me, then I felt someone's hand on my shoulder.

'I'm so sorry Sakura', it was Syaoran and he was here for me. Half an hour ago I called Ryu to tell him what happened and why I rushed off. I made it clear to him that I didn't want him around for space. My mum called Syaoran 's parents and told them the news and now Syaoran was by side when I needed him the most.

I quickly wiped away my tears and said 'I wasn't even around, and I wanted to be', he sat next to me and looked at me. He knew me well better than anyone could.

'I just want you to know that I'm here for you, and I will stay here all night if you need me', he hugged me tightly and I sighed. I felt so safe in his arms.

He stayed in my place all night again because I kept crying by the chimney, but he was there for me. He cooked something for me, he gave me tissues and he was just there for me. I could never forget that moment.

The next day at school I was so sad. I could barely concentrate on my work. I was so depressed. I was sitting under a big shady tree and I was talking to Syaoran . Then I saw Ryu walking towards me, then when he was right in front of me, Syaoran stood up to give us time to talk.

'Sakura I'm so sorry'

'I'm fine, don't be sorry about anything', he reached out for my hand but I pulled away.

'This is just a hard time for me Ryu I hope you can understand'

'Yeah I do, but if you ever need anything, I want you to know that I'm here for yo-', I cut him off from talking.

'I think we need a break'.

'A what?'

'A break, Ryu its just things are different …'

'We can still'

'No we can't, I'm sorry Ryu but its so complicated right now', I stood up and I looked around the school ground 'I don't even feel like myself anymore, I can't even smile anymore', I felt his hug behind me and I pulled away.

'When will I know that we're allright?'

'I really don't know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way'

'Can we be friends?'

'It'll be harder to that if we're always seeing each other'

'Okay', he stood in front of me and he asked me one more question before he left 'Are you sure there's no other reason why you want to do this?'

'There's no reason', I watched him walk away to his friends.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Today was the funeral for my father. I was now dressed in black to go to the funeral. It was going to be in Tokyo, St. Patrick's Church. I looked at myself. It had been a week ever since this happened, and I stopped eating, and I was now in normal weight. I had lost 10 kilos overall.

The other night when I went in my sister's room, I found pills in her drawer and they looked like one of those dangerous pills that you find in clubs.

Now I was going downstairs and I was going with Syaoran . I was glad he was my friend and I loved him to death because he was always there for me. While my dad was about to get buried, I was in the front row. I watched the coffin and I stared at it. I know soon enough that the will was going to be read. Mr. and Mrs. Li was also there with my mum, they had been so supported of my mother, while my sister was there. My mother found out that my sister had a boyfriend and forced her to break it off. Now the three women of the Kinomoto were crying, for the loss of our dear father.

After the funeral, people were at our house and I was in my bedroom. Syaoran knocked on my bedroom door, and he asked me 'Are you doing allright?'

He came in and closed the door behind him and I said 'No not really', he sat next to me and smiled.

'Sakura, I just want to remind you that I can't stay for long in Australia, I'm leaving in 2 weeks'

'I know and I don't want you to', I hugged him and I looked up at him, we were so close to each other. He slowly bent his head and kissed me passionately. We stayed in a lip lock for a while until I moved away and I stood up 'I don't know why I did that'.

'It was my fault', but I turned around and kissed him and he kissed me back with so much feelings, passion. Then one thing led to another. He was so different from Ryu because when they made love together, there was so much passion in it and he made sure he wasn't hurting me, I eventually slept through the afternoon and a couple of hours later I found myself naked under a layer or silk bed sheet. There was a note in my side table.

_I'm sorry I couldn't stay long but I needed to go. I need to start packing up my things so I guess I'll see you around. I hope you get better with this situation and give me a call if you need to talk. I heard about what happened with you and Ryu and I'm so sorry. _

I was upset that he didn't even mentioned what just happened. But who could blame him, none of us expected it coming. I mean he was my best friend. I've known him for such a long while now, and us sleeping together would change a lot.

I didn't feel awkward around him anymore, but I only had a week to spend the rest of our time together. We promised each other that we would never talk about what happened and try to forget it. My relationship with Ryu was starting to get better because we were trying to solve things out, but I would never ever in the world tell him that I slept with Syaoran because he would never talk to me. Ryu came to me one PE class begging me back, but I didn't know what to say.

I was just getting out of the girls locker rooms and I heard someone calling out my name, so I turned around and saw Ryu running towards me 'Ryu I told you that we're on a break'

'I know but Sakura, I want you back, I'll do anything', he was so close to me and I took a step back.

'Ryu, you don't have to do anything. I've made up my mind. We can get back together'

'Really?', he sounded so excited and shocked.

'Yes', I smiled at him, then he lifted me up and swirled me around 'Wait, but Syaoran 's leaving in a week, try and be nice to him, I might not see him for years'

'Okay I understand', he bent his head and kissed me. We spent that afternoon together, and since it was Thursday we watched a movie and I cuddled up to him. I could tell that he missed me so much.

2 days before Syaoran was going to leave for Japan, I was spending the whole day with him. I really didn't want him to leave because I had this weird feeling inside of me that I wanted him to stay with me forever. But I couldn't have everything I wanted in life. I knocked on his door and Kin answered the door and said 'Sakura its good to see you, Syaoran is just changing upstairs, he had a class today, so yeah'

'Okay, I'll just wait outside?'

'Yeah come in, can I get you a drink?'

'No thanks', I sat down in the kitchen and most of their stuff was gone because they were leaving in two days. 'I don't want to be nosy, but when do you think you can come back?'

'I don't know probably a couple of months because we have to settle in and Syaoran has to settle in with the school'

Syaoran entered the room and he kissed me in the cheeks and asked 'You ready to go?', I stood up and I followed him out of the door.

We were so happy together just watching an IMAX show. He got me in a boat and I wasn't so scared anymore since Ryu helped me with the weakness. I looked at him, things were going to be different when he was gone and I really wasn't going to have anyone to talk me through anything. He snapped me out of my thoughts by asking me 'Will you write back to me if I write to you?'

'Yeah definitely I would do anything to communicate with you', our hands accidentally touched each others and he looked at me. His eyes were so pretty.

'I wish I could tell you everything Sakura', he stood up and I followed behind him.

'What do you mean?'

'I haven't been telling you why I'm leaving, I could stay here with you but I decided to go on with it'.

'Tell me what you are talking about'

'You'll find out in a couple of days Sakura, trust me'

'Syaoran I want to know now'

'I'm sorry'.

Today was the day Syaoran was leaving for Japan and he was leaving early this morning. I decided to visit him, but I was too late. I cried as I saw the plane go away. I thought that was the plane, but I heard his voice behind me 'Sakura, what are you doing here?'

'I came to say goodbye', he smiled at me and walked towards me and I jumped on him.

'I wish you didn't because it would be easier', I started crying, then he wiped away my tears 'You know I'll always visit you when I can'

'But that could be never'

'Trust me, I promise to visit you', I pulled away from the hug since he had to go now. I waved at him as he looked at me one last time.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

When Syaoran got to Japan, everything was moving so fast. Everything was ready, and they were just making an announcement soon. He hated having to keep this from Sakura, but he wasn't allowed to say a word. He was now in a limo and it just stopped. They were in front of the palace. Someone opened the door for him and when he got out, he saw his grandmother.

'Its good to see you Syaoran , how was your trip?'

'It was good', he lied.

'Come on in, just leave everything, I'm going to show you around. By the way how was your lessons? Did you enjoy it?'

'No', he hated those stupid classes 'Can I use your phone?'

'No you can't, Syaoran you have to get used to this life. I know you had to leave everyone behind, but you have to move forward'

'What you want me to forget the life I had in Australia?'

'If that's what you have to do'.

'I hate this, I didn't even get a choice!'

'Calm down now Syaoran ', he walked out of the stupid palace and started walking away.

I had been sick lately. I didn't know what was wrong with me, but I haven't told anyone of it. My mother was taking a break from all this chaos and decided to live with my Aunt Fely for the rest of the year, so it was just me and Aiko in the house. She has had non-stop parties which was annoying, and I knew she was getting high and taking all different kind of pills. Its funny how I'm actually saying this but I wanted Makoto back with Aiko because she seemed to be a better person around him. Aiko still had feelings for Makoto but it wasn't as strong anymore as it used to be.

It was around July, near my birthday, and it had been 2 weeks ever since Syaoran left. I was getting sick every morning now, so I told Ryu about it, during lunch, while I was by my locker.

'Ryu I have to tell you something'

'What is it?', looking at me wondering what was up.

'I've been sick lately'

'Sick as meaning what?'

'Sick, vomiting but that's all'

'Maybe its just a flu or something?'

'I don't know but I might be pregnant'

'Pregnant? But we always used protection?'

'I know but it could have broke', I was starting to frown thinking of the situation. What if I was pregnant?

'Sakura, after school today, I'll buy a pregnancy test for you'.

'I'm scared'

'We have to make sure first'.

So after school that day, I found out that I was pregnant and it was a real shock. The last thing in my mind was that it could be Syaoran 's baby. I was still so scare because I was only 16, turning 17 and I was pregnant. Ryu was still with me when I found out and he asked 'What are we going to do?'

'I don't know but I don't want to have an abortion'

'What would your parents say?'

'They'd allow me to make the choice'

'I don't know what to do anymore Ryu', I hugged him tightly, I was so scared.

A week after the whole situation. Syaoran was being forced to go to a boarding school. It was rich and it had a good education. Sachi wanted to do the best for Syaoran even though it meant forcing him to do things that he didn't like. Kin and Nyoko were too busy doing paper work for all this, and this weekend, they were going to make an announcement to the press of what happened. Syaoran was looking outside his window. He really missed Sakura so badly and they hadn't talked to each other since he left, but he wrote her a letter, but he wasn't sure if it reached her. So he decided to call her, he dialed the number and Aiko answered the phone 'Hello, hey Aiko is Sakura home?'

'Syaoran its good to hear from you. Sakura's not here, she's visiting the doctor'

'Is something wrong with her?'

'Nothing big, but I think she's pregnant'.

He froze hearing those words, Sakura was pregnant and there was a chance it could be his because they slept together, 'Is she going to be home soon', he asked.

'No not really, they've been gone the whole day'

'Who?'

'Ryu and her, I think he's telling his parents so yeah. My mum doesn't know about this and I don't think she wants to know'

He stood up shocked as hell 'Has she gotten a letter or anything?'

'No not yet, why did you send her one?'

'Yeah, but ages ago'

'Okay, I'll tell her you called. Take care of yourself allright?'

'Okay, you too', when Aiko hanged up, Sakura just entered the house.

Syaoran was still shocked by all this. He went downstairs because he was having dinner soon. Tomorrow, which was Monday, July 15, he was going to the Boarding School. He really was starting to hate Sachi, but he knew he didn't get a choice anymore. He ate his dinner in silence thinking of the news he got from Aiko.

I asked 'Who was that one the phone', seeing Aiko putting the phone down.

'Its was your friend, he just wanted to see how you were doing and I told him'

'Told him what?'

'I know your pregnant Sakura, don't even try hiding this from me. Why didn't you tell me? Were you scared I was going to tell mum?'

'Well are you going to?'

'No, because I'm doing you a favor', I looked at her and she was different.

'You got back with him didn't you?'

'Makoto you mean, the guy you most hate?'

'Yes, that Makoto'

'Yeah, he really loves me', I smiled at her, finally she was settling down with someone 'Syaoran said that he wrote to you, did you get any letter?'

'No, he said he would before he left I guess he was just too busy, did he say he was going to call back?'

'No, but he was really worried about you'

'I know, he always is'. I walked upstairs and closed the door, I broke down in tears, and I looked ay myself, what was I going to do? I just met Ryu's parents and they were happy to take me in their family and the baby, but what if the baby wasn't Ryu's? I did sleep once with Syaoran .

I cried to my sleep that night, having a dream. It was a weird dream, something about Syaoran .

_I was coming home from school as normal, but I was 6 months pregnant now. Today was my last day of school and I was dropping out. Then I saw Syaoran in front of me, and he was changed. He looked different, and I walked towards him missing him, then he hugged me tightly and said to me 'I missed you so much Sakura'_

'_Me too', but I saw someone behind him. I haven't seen those people before and I stepped back and asked 'Who are they?'_

'_I'm a Prince, Sakura'_

'_What?', I repeated I was completely lost now._

'_I'm a prince', I stepped back, shocked at the news he just gave me and I started running away. He went after me and he didn't stop and finally when we were all alone, in a field and it was raining, he said 'I love you so much', then suddenly it all blacked out._

I

woke up from that dream. My heart beating so fast. Then I looked at my alarm clock. It was only 3.00 a.m. I was scared because I was pregnant and to get all this thoughts out of my head I went for a walk near the beach. I looked at the water as the sun was just starting to go up, wondering if I'll ever see Syaoran again. I missed him so much but I didn't want to act like this in front of Ryu because he loved me. I knew how he felt about me and I can't just leave him. It would break his heart. So I decided to live with this. I promised myself that I would keep this baby and raise it.

When I went back home, I was a letter by the mailbox. I looked through it and saw a letter from Syaoran . I quickly opened it, so curious of what was going to be said in the letter. I sat by the stairs and I opened it.

_Dear Sakura,_

_It had been so long since I've talked to you. I want you to know that I haven't been avoiding you. It just life here in Japan is so much different. Yes, I miss you, but I can't call you right now. My stupid grandmother is forcing me to live this life that I don't want to live. Before anyone else knows the truth, I'm to be coronated Prince this weekend. It's a long story, I would tell you but there's so much to tell you besides that. Ever since your dad's funeral, I was thinking of the relationship we could have had. If we were going out as lovers, not as friends, but its too late to change that. We've always been used to seeing each others as friends nothing more. That New Year's Day you confessed to me about your feelings, I had the same feelings for you, but I was just too shock to say anything. Shock that someone could actually like me, maybe even love me._

_I've had some many dreams about you. I can't stop thinking about you. I want to leave this hell, but I can't, I feel like a prisoner in this place. Sakura, I just want you to know that you've changed my life and I'm glad you were the one that changed me. There's so much I wan to say to you but I can't. I don't want to hurt your feelings anymore; I don't want to say more that might hurt you even more. I don't want to see you cry again. I knew you went to the airport the day I left. I saw you, but I just … _

_Anyway, if I ever have time, which I probably won't have, I promise to visit you. I just want you to know that you'll always be in my mind. And even though your with Ryu now, and he loves you, I just want you to know that there's always going to be someone else loving you no matter what._

_Missing you,_

_Syaoran ._

As soon as I read that letter, tears started to fall down my face. Maybe he'll be coming here anytime now because he knows that I'm pregnant. If he did, I would have to lie to him. I didn't want to be a burden to him. And he was a PRINCE? I was confused about that. What was he talking about. I wanted all this questions to be answered, but no-one had the answers. Suddenly, Ryu came up in front of my house who saw me crying, he asked 'Sakura are you allright?', today we were meeting his parents again. I had gotten used to his parents because they were so nice, and they welcomed her and made her feel comfortable.

'Nothings wrong', wiping away my tears quickly and hiding the letter.

'So are you ready to go?', helping me up. Ever since we found out that I was pregnant, he's been so careful around me. I barely went partying anymore because most of those parties would have alcohol and I couldn't take those.

'I haven't eaten breakfast yet'

'Its allright, we can have it at my house'

'Okay', I quickly got changed upstairs and he waited for me downstairs. My sister Aiko liked Ryu because even though he was popular, he still treated girls well. Unlike some of the elite people in the school who treated people like shit.

I was in the car with Ryu and I could feel his eyes on me. He touched my hand as if he was trying to read my thoughts. We haven't said a word to each other ever since we left my house. There was nothing I could say to him. He whispered to me concerned 'Is something bothering you?'

'No … its nothing its just a bit a mood swings'

'Are you sure, you've been so done lately?'

'Everything is allright Ryu, don't worry about me', he kissed me in the cheeks and he hugged me tightly. I liked the way he was concerned about me because I knew that he loved me, even though I didn't tell him anything. He knew me well enough to tell when I was down. Finally when we were at his place, which was near the beach, because Ryu's father was a politician and he was rich. He helped me get out and he asked 'Come on … don't be so nervous you've met them before'.

I stopped walking and I asked him 'Do you want this?'

'Want what?'

'This baby, what if it's not what you're going to expect?'

'What are you talking about?'

'Ryu I haven't been telling you the truth lately …'

'The truth about what? Sakura answer me'

'When we had a break, I slept with Syaoran … it was on my dad's funeral. I didn't know why it happened but he didn't force me'

'What?', getting angry, he couldn't believe I was just telling him now 'Why didn't you tell me earlier, when we got back together?'

'Because I was scared of how you'd react, are you angry at me?'

'How can I not be, you've been lying to me!'

'Ryu we were on the break, we were allowed to do anything we could have wanted'

'But I stayed faithful to you because I loved you. Remember you pushed me away!'

'I didn't mean to'

'Sakura does he know that it might be yours?'

'I don't know', I turned my back on him. I didn't want to see his face anymore. I was ashamed of myself. Then he came up behind me.

'I made a promise to you Sakura, lets just pretend its mine. I don't want to complicate this anymore', I turned around and looked into his eyes. This was a promise he was making right now. A promise I knew he wouldn't break.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

Back in Japan, it wasn't going so well. Syaoran decided to run away from the palace because he couldn't take this. It had been over a month since he last talked to Sakura and it was driving him crazy not to talk to her. Even though it hadn't been announced that he was next in line for the throne, he was going to risk everything for Sakura. He packed up his bag and sneaked out, and he got out of there without a sweat, he was in a plane back to Australia now, thinking of ways to confront Sakura about her getting pregnant. He knew his grandparents would have agents looking for him as soon as they found out, but that wasn't maybe till the next morning, when he would already be in Australia.

A couple of hours later … Syaoran was back in Australia. He was in Sydney Airport and he knew his way around. He took the train to Blacktown, knowing it would take long. He wanted to surprise her. He got out of the train and started walking to Sakura's house. It was around 8.30 at night. He rang the doorbell and saw Sakura, who had a bump on her belly.

I asked him 'Oh my god, Syaoran what are you doing here?'

'I came here for you. I heard what happened', he looked at me as if he was trying to read me, 'I just came here to ask you one question … who's baby is it?'

I answered truthfully 'I don't know. I really don't know', he came in the house and I closed the door behind him 'My sister's not home, but please don't stay long here'.

'Tell me if it meant anything, when we slept together?', he looked at me, desperately wanting to know my answer.

'It meant something, but I'm with Ryu now, I can't just leave him. He made a promise to me. To stay with me through this'

'It's not even his baby. Sakura I know you better than anyone else. I can see through you. I know when you're lying'

'So what Syaoran ? Your not even suppose to be here!', I started crying. I couldn't deny it anymore and now that he was here, it was getting worse. 'What do you want me to do?'

'I don't know, come with me, I'll go anywhere with you'.

'I don't want to bring you down because of this baby, you have a life to live', I touched his cheeks and he held his hand on mine.

'I don't want to live life without you. I could barely live without you that's why I just had to see you'.

'No, we can't. Syaoran please leave!'

'I'm not leaving you like this', he tried getting sense into me.

I pushed him and said 'Leave please', I started crying hard not wanting to do this but I didn't have a choice anymore.

'I'm not leaving you. I want you to know that I love you and I don't want to leave you like this', he touched me, and he hugged me tightly even though I was trying to push him away, and I fell down on the floor with him. He was here for me, and I liked that. But having him back here would complicate everything. My relationship with Ryu, and maybe his relationship with his parents. He carried me to bed that night and took care of me. He went downstairs and called his dad Kin.

'Hello, this is Kin Litalking',

'It's me dad'

'Where the hell are you Syaoran , your grandparents have gone crazy looking for you'

'I'm where I'm suppose to be –', there was a pause as he tried finding the courage to tell his dad that he got a girl pregnant 'Sakura's pregnant with my baby'

'What are you talking about?'

'I'm at her place now and she isn't doing so well'

'Does she know about you?'

'I told her in the letter I gave her but I don't think she has noticed that its big'

'I want you to tell her the REAL truth, no more lies'

'I can't tell her right now, she's sleeping. She's really tired'

'Okay but just tell her, we're still going through the announcement tomorrow'

'Okay, dad please don't tell anyone else. Mum can know because she can understand'

'Okay, good luck boy and take care of her', he dropped the phone and he sat back on the chair. Seeing her again made him feel alive again but he wasn't sure what he should do right now. Maybe they could run away and elope? He could leave her and leave Sakura to be with Ryu? But all those choices didn't get Sakura's choice and first things tomorrow morning they would talk about it.

I woke up to be alone in my bed, and all I could remember from last night was that I saw Syaoran again, and he came for me. I wanted my questions to be answered like what did he mean in the letter that he was a prince? I stood up slowly and went downstairs and I saw Syaoran making coffee. I weakly smiled at him and asked 'What time did you wake up?'

'Just now but I was hungry, you want some coffee?'

'No thanks', I sat nearby the counter and looked at him, 'I need to ask you one question …'

'What is it?', he sat beside me and looked at me.

'You wrote in the letter you were a prince? What does that mean?'

'I'm a Prince because the next in line for the throne for the British Royal Crown was murdered and we're next. I'm Royal by blood. Today they're going to make an announcement to the world and I'm supposed to be there with them. But I don't want to. I'd rather be with you'.

I was shocked at what he just told me. He was a PRINCE! A real life prince and all I could say was 'I don't believe it'

'Believe what you want but it's the truth'

I touched him and asked 'So this baby in me is next in line for the throne?'

'Yes, that's why if you were thinking of having an abortion I wouldn't let you'

'I just want to run away from all this …', I walked towards the window and looked out.

'I love you and I want to support you with every decision you make', I felt him touched my shoulder, so I turned around and hugged him tightly.

'I love you too'.

_They had no idea that outside that house, there was FBI's all around it and they were there to take back Syaoran . They tracked the phone call he made last night and listened to it and went straight to the Kinomoto residence. Sachi didn't take the news very well and told the FBI to try and bring Syaoran and Sakura back because she wanted a word with this **Sakura.**_

When I was going back to the kitchen to get my coffee, someone burst in the door and I dropped my cup. Then I saw a man dressed in black go for Syaoran and someone took me and dragged me to a car, I yelled out 'Get your hands off me'.

Syaoran and I were put in separate cars and I asked what was going on 'What's going on here?'

'Your going to be flied over to Japan. The Prince's mother would like to have a talk to you'.

'I don't want to talk to her! Let me out of this goddamn car!'

'We can't do that'.

When they got to Japan. Syaoran talked to his parents, while I was walking towards Sachi's office. Behind me were agents, there for me in case I tried running away. But I couldn't do that now. Sachi's door was half open and I came in, sitting down in the chair in front of her table.

Sachi said 'I just want to cut the chase'

'What do you want with me?'

'I want you to stay away from my grandson'

'I didn't force him to come to me you know, so I didn't do anything wrong'

'You're goddamn pregnant with his child and you're telling me it's not my business. Stay away from him before you make me do something bad'.

'Like what?'

'I don't know, this is your last warning Sakura Kinomoto, you stay away from Syaoran ', I started crying. If we moved a bit faster, we would have gone or maybe even eloped.

'Fine', she would have to give up Syaoran , to make sure he has a better life than her.

'When you say fine, I actually expect you to keep your word'.

'I will, just let me go home', as I was about to leave, Syaoran burst in the room.

'Grandma don't do anything to Sakura'

'I didn't', said Sachi.

He looked at me and I walked past him and I walked out of the door, he went after me and I said 'Stay away from me Syaoran , we can't keep doing this'

'What do you mean?'

'We can't see each other anymore. It's over. I don't want to see you anymore'.

'She said something didn't she? I want to know what she said to you'.

'Nothing, she made me realize that this wasn't going to work. I'm sorry for making you think we actually had a chance'.

'Sakura please, don't do this'

'I'm sorry, I hope you have a great life … I'll be seeing you', I walked out of his life right there. I couldn't believe it. This was the end. But I was glad I knew that it wasn't the end for him because he still had his throne as a Prince and it was going to be announced tonight.

When she went back home, Ryu was there having dinner with my sister. They had gotten along so well. Makoto too came later on for dinner. We really didn't need to depend on my mother anymore because she shut us out of her life when our dad died. I guess this was her way of dealing with the grief and we were fine with that. That moment, when I was talking with Ryu outside, I realized that this could be my life. To be with him. We stayed out all night talking and looking at the stars and he made me think of the kind of life we could get. I loved his parents, they were so welcoming and they were better compare to Syaoran 's family who forced him to be a person he isn't. I stayed in his arms feeling so safe in it.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

I gave birth to a baby girl and named her Machiko Erin Kinomoto. Since I wasn't married to Ryu or we weren't planning to get married any soon. He decided to drop out with me at the end of the 1st semester and that was allright. I was still in hospital tired because the labour happened early this morning. The news about Syaoran being a Prince was out, it had been over 7 months since I last saw him, I missed him but I knew I couldn't be around him. I loved Ryu now and I wouldn't leave him for anything, I loved the way he supported me through this whole situation, and that he was there when I gave birth to Machiko. He just came in the room to get me some food.

'Feeling better, or are you still tired?', he smiled at me, sitting in my bed 'I got you something to eat since you hate hospital food'.

'Still a bit tired, thanks for the food', rummaging through the bag that he brought.

'My parents might come over'.

'That's, fine. Though I want to get out of this hospital as soon as possible. Being in a hospital gives me creeps', he laughed at me and he stood up.

'Okay I'll be back, I'll just tell the nurses outside'. His parents got me and Ryu a place to leave in. A lake house, it was really beautiful there. It was isolated in a place and had a forest around there.

Ryu's parents came in the room and Mai said 'Hello Sakura'.

'How are you doing?' Taro asked.

'I'm feeling fine, just a bit tired'

'So where's our granddaughter?'

'She's in the infant room, you can have a look at her later'

'So what did you decide to name her?'

'Machiko, isn't it a pretty name?'

'Yeah, so cute. Sakura we want you to marry Ryu. I mean you two love each other right?'

'Yeah, but its not my decision, you also have to ask your son if he wants to marry me'

Mai said 'He can't stop talking about it. But before he asks you, he wants to know that you want to do it'

'But I'm so young'

'That doesn't matter right?'

'Okay … but I –', Ryu came in the room and I stopped talking. I didn't want to ruin anything right now. I was so happy that he loved me that much to take in Syaoran 's child and still ask me to marry me. It was a lot to ask from him, but he was still doing it.

Ryu said 'You're allowed to go home as soon as your ready, Sakura I already did all of the paper work'

'Okay thanks Ryu', when Taro and Mai left to see Machiko, Ryu sat near me and he hasn't said anything since he came in.

I was eating my food and I asked 'Is anything wrong?'

'I got an interview for the firefighter job', I stopped eating and looked at him. Honestly I didn't want him to take that job, but it was his dream job. I was scared for him, because what if he went to his job and never came back?

'Really, where at?'

'Around Parramatta area … is that allright with you?'

'Yeah its fine', I was lying through my teeth. I was already holding him back by staying with me because of Machiko and dropping out of highschool because he wanted to be with me and support me.

'I love you, did you know that?', I smiled at him.

'I love you too'.

Early the next morning Ryu couldn't take me home so he had an interview with the Fire Department and I was being driven home in a limo with young Machiko. She was so cute and she was less than a day old. I smiled at her, wondering how Syaoran was now. I kind of felt sorry for him, because he was forced to live 'that' life that he didn't even want in the first place. I though of the situation now, of what may have happened if I stayed with Syaoran . I shook my head and looked down, Machiko's father will always be Syaoran and that made it harder for me to get over him.

I looked around the big house. There was a lot to fix but I had all the time in the world. I wasn't just going to live my life as a mother, but I was also going to follow my dream. I've always wanted to be a fashion designer. I envied the life of those rich and famous people because I've always been a girl next door. I was only 17, years old and so much had happened in less than a year. It was around November. Christmas was soon and I couldn't wait.

The phone rang and I couldn't find it, I accidentally bumped on a box from my house and I opened it. There was Syaoran 's letter in there and I started crying. This started something bad. A maid was taking care of Machiko who was sleeping right at this moment and Ryu came home and saw her crying by the lake. He knew that I didn't take the news so well about how Ryu was a Prince, and I told him everything that happened, because I wanted to be honest to him. He came up behind me and asked 'Are you allright?'

I turned around and said 'Hi Ryu', wiping away my tears.

He smiled at me and asked 'Tell me what's wrong'

'Nothing, just normal feelings …'

'Talk to me about it, I want us to be honest with each other you know'

'It's Syaoran again. Ryu I'm sorry for thinking about him'

'It's not your fault, I guess it normal I guess. He was probably you first love, but we're together now right?'

'Yeah', I looked at him and asked 'Can we go somewhere tonight?'

'Are you sure you want to? You know there's going to be press going after you'

'Its allright, lets go somewhere private anyway'

'Okay', he hugged me tightly and said 'I just want you know I'm here for you no matter what allright?'

'I know'

That night after dinner, I was holding his hand and we were talking. We came home and we were all over each other. He asked 'Are you sure you want to do this straight away?'

I nodded at him and we started moving towards the guest house because we didn't want anyone to hear what we were doing. After we made love 2 times, we just laid in bed panting and trying to catch our breaths. He admitted 'That was amazing'

All I could do was laugh, and I slowly fell asleep in his arms. This was what life was like and I loved it.

Back in Japan. Syaoran 's life wasn't so well. He hated everything about his life now and he was still yearning from Sakura. He took out all his anger in jogging, every afternoon he would jog for at least 2 hours, he did that to get away from all the chaos in his life. He missed her so much and he wanted to see her again. He had heard that she just given birth to a baby girl and that he should be the father beside her, taking care of her. He didn't even know what the baby was called.

Kado and Sachi wasn't around that time because they were in Japan visiting someone. It was Nyoko, Kin & Syaoran eating dinner and he wasn't talking. Nyoko said 'I'm sorry about this Syaoran , but maybe we could visit Sakura sometime if you want. You have a holiday coming up soon and I'm going to allow you to visit her'.

'I don't want to visit her mother', he had been feeling so empty lately and nothing could make it better.

'Syaoran eat your food, you haven't been the same, I don't want you to be unhealthy', said his caring mother.

'Mother I really don't want to eat right now. I'm going up to my room', he stood up and started going to his room.

When he was gone, Kin suggested 'Maybe we should have a party inviting Sakura. He needs to see her, he's dying here.

'We can't remember. My mother doesn't want to see them together'.

'We can't just watch him waste away like this'.

'Maybe we could set up something'.

'I heard she's going for an interview as a fashion designer. We could help her maybe?'

'No, she's a smart girl, she'll be expecting something in return from us'.

'Yeah your right', said Nyoko. Even though I was a drop-out, I still had the potentials.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

Ryu got the job as a fireman and, today, I was going for an interview and I was going to be showing my designs to this well known rich designers. I was dressed in a beautiful black dress and I walked in the conference room and people looked at me. One of the men stood up and introduced himself, he was dressed in this classic black suit and he said 'I'm glad you could make it Sakura, I'm Darien Lopes'

'It's good to see meet you Darien', I smiled warmly at him, they were over 20, and I haven't even turned 18.

'This is Sumi, Desiree and Ramos, next to me', he sat back down and I looked at him. He looked like he was 20 years old and I had to admit he was cute.

'I'm glad you let me see you in such short notice, I'll just cut to the chase'.

Sumi butted it 'Are you still at school Ms. Kinomoto?'

'No, I dropped out because I got pregnant', Sumi looked at Desiree and Darien just smiled at me.

'That doesn't matter, as long as you've got the skills, right Ramos?'

Ramos flicked through my designs and said 'These are pretty good, different from the fashion now. But I'm not so sure'.

Darien said 'Sakura just leave your portfolio and I'll contact you in a couple of days'.

I stood up and looked at the other three in the room and I thought to myself _'There are so rude'._ I smiled and walked out of there, feeling like I was stupid because they made me. My phone rang and it was Ryu. Lately he had been calling me making sure I was allright. I loved him so much and I knew soon enough that he would be proposing to me. We sometimes entered jewelry stores and while I was in the necklace section, he would be in the ring section, making finding out a ring for me.

'Hi Ryu'

'You want to go out for dinner tonight?' he loved taking me out to dinner because the rest of the night turns out really good.

'I don't know. I just got an interview and it didn't go so well. They looked down on me'.

'Don't worry about it. I'm sure you'll get feedback'.

'Ryu, I'm just wondering, do you love me?'

'Of course I do. Why would you want to ask that kind of question?'

'I've just been wondering …'

'Okay, I have to go. I'll call you later? Wait … Are we still going out for that dinner?'

'Sure why not?', I started walking towards the elevator and I hanged up. When the elevator doors started opening, I saw Nyoko & Kin Li. I was shocked to see them, but inside me I wondered if Syaoran was with them.

Nyoko smiled at me and she said 'My goodness Sakura, hello, how are you doing?'

'I'm fine Nyoko, how are you?', Kin stood beside her and he smiled at me, they were such a loving couple.

'We were just about to have lunch, you want to join us to catch up on stuff?'

'Sure why not', I answered. I knew this was leading to somewhere but I couldn't say no to them.

I joined them for lunch and we went to some poshy restaurant and ordered something, then I had to ask 'Where's Syaoran , didn't he come with you?'

'No, he's not allowed to leave Japan. His grandmother won't let him, so Sakura are you still with Ryu?'

'Yeah I am', I smiled awkwardly at them. Ever since I gave birth to Machiko, I've never spoken to them and they were the REAL grandparents for her.

'How's the baby?'

'Fine, just perfect, I had a baby girl and I named her Machiko'.

'That's a lovely name'.

I looked at Kin and he hasn't said much during this lunch, so I asked him 'Kin, how's Syaoran doing?'

'Trying his best, he just isn't the same person anymore. He barely talks and eats. I'm starting to wonder what he does when he's not around us'.

'I'm sorry for causing all this'

'It was not your fault Sakura. He's just not himself right now', they smiled at me and I remembered I had to meet Ryu this afternoon because I still haven't made up my mind if I wanted to go dinner with him, so I excused myself.

'It was nice seeing you two again Kin & Nyoko, but I have to go. I have to meet Ryu before he comes out of work. Thanks for having me for lunch', I started packing up my stuff and I accidentally forgot my keys in the table because I dropped it, Nyoko saw me drop this and while I was in front of my car, I could hear her voice.

Nyoko ran to me and said 'You forgot your keys. Sakura, I know your with Ryu now, but I think Syaoran and you needs to talk somehow, he's not doing so well'.

'What could I do to make him better?'

'I don't know. We're throwing a party for his 19th Birthday Party and I'm asking you to come'.

'I can't do that Nyoko you know that'.

'I'll make sure she's not around'.

'I still can't do it. I know something's going to happen between us if I go to that party and I don't want to ruin the great relationship I have with Ryu now. I mean he's an amazing guy'.

'I know, but please try and make it. I don't have the invitation with me now, but I'll send it to you'.

'I'll try Nyoko, I can't make any promises and I don't want to have to keep this from Ryu'.

'You won't have to, you can tell him about this so that he could come with you'.

'I'll see you around, bye', I went inside my car and thought about what she just told me. I wasn't sure of going because if I did see Syaoran once again. I didn't know what to tell him. I couldn't just pick up from where we left off.

I visited Ryu during work. I knocked on his office, and no-one was in there, so I sat down in front of his table and waited for him. Someone else came in the room who looked like Ryu's pal, Dennis Wilson.

'He's in the boss's office, he won't be long now. I don't think I've met you, I'm Dennis Wilson', he shook his hand for me to shake.

'Sakura Kinomoto, its nice to meet you. I've heard about you. Ryu has mentioned you now and then', I kissed him in the cheeks and he smiled at me. I looked out the window and I asked 'How long have you been doing this?'

'2 years at least, but it's a great job, makes you feel like a real hero. I heard about the baby you just had, congratulations'.

'Thanks', Ryu came in the room and he kissed me in the lips, and I said 'I met your friend here'. Danny stood up and he left us.

'I've been trying to call you, where were you?', he hugged me from behind and I was unsure whether or not to tell him.

'I've just had lunch with Syaoran 's parents', I felt him tense up so I turned around and faced him 'Nothing happened I promise'.

'But what did they want?', before I used to tell him that whenever Syaoran 's parents would talk to me, there would be a point to it.

'Nothing, they just invited me to Syaoran 's birthday bash, according to them, he isn't doing so well'.

'I'm sorry, but are you going?', I looked away from him, not knowing what to say.

'I don't know', he kissed me passionately and I said 'We're still going for dinner tonight right?'

'Yeah, sure', he kissed me in the neck and we started walking to his car. I felt that he didn't want me seeing Syaoran again, or for me to go to that party but I didn't want Syaoran to live the rest of his life, a hell.

We got home and we got changed so that we could go out for dinner, and it was around 7.30 when we left. We were in the car, and Ryu hasn't said much ever since I told him what Syaoran 's parents wanted me to do, so I had to ask him 'Is everything allright?'

'Yeah … I was just thinking', he smiled warmly at me.

'Good, I didn't want the rest of the night feeling awkward', then we arrived to the poshy restaurant and we went to our own private area. We had our own area because the owner of the restaurant was Ryu's cousin, Jane Eba, they looked a like and when I first saw them I thought they were sisters or something, but they weren't.

We ordered our food and I noticed that something was going to happen tonight, I just didn't know. He kept smiling at me all night and I started to feel hot. I broke the silence by saying 'Ryu, stop looking at me', I was really starting to get annoyed for some reason.

'I'm sorry', he looked away, and I could see him taking out something from his pocket, but I was unsure of it.

'I need to go toilet, I'll be back', somehow I felt irritated around him, because I really hated it when people hid stuff from me, it made me act bitchy.

'Okay', he said. He was starting to get worried for me, but it wasn't my fault. After I went to the toilet and I came back, I felt different around him.

'Is something bothering you Sakura?', I looked away from him as he asked me that question, and that answered it.

'I've just been moody lately'.

'I love you, do you know that?'

'I love you too', he stood up from his chair and he walked beside me and took something out from his pocket, a black box. He knelt in front of me and I knew instantly what he was going to ask me.

'Sakura, I know we've been through so much. But all that matters to me is that I love you. I'll love you no matter what, be with you, I'll do anything for you, so that is why, I'm asking you to marry me because I think we're ready for the next level. So will you marry me?'

'No', I answered and that broke his smile. I felt guilty but I couldn't just say yes to him because he asked me.

'I don't understand, is there a reason why you said no?'

'No', he stood up and started getting angry. This night didn't turn out to what he expected, and I had to tell him why I said no 'You asked me at the wrong time Ryu, and we haven't even been together for more than a year, well in a stable relationship no, but I do love you Ryu'.

'What are you saying?'

'We need to know each other more, I know you were expecting a yes from me, but you know me, no-one can force me to do stuff I don't want. But I do want to marry you, just not now', I stood up and hugged him tightly and I whispered to him 'I'll always love you'.

That night when we were in bed, Ryu hasn't talked to me. He couldn't get over the fact that I didn't say yes to him and it was killing him inside because all these thoughts of me and Syaoran being together in the past, and I asked him 'You don't have to worry Ryu, I'm faithful to you'.

'Its not that, its just I'm scared for the future, what if Machiko wants to know about her real father, what are we going to say to her?'

'The truth might be good but I don't know, she might take it the wrong way. But we don't have to worry about that yet, she's not growing up that fast, she's just a baby'.

'Are you going to the party?', he asked me holding me tightly by the waist.

'Yeah, nothing's going to happen Ryu, I mean, he's the Prince, I wouldn't just foolishly sleep with him and leave him'.

'Okay, do you want me to come with you?'

'If you want, but I doubt you can because you have a busy work', he kissed me and I said 'I've been thinking about what you asked me earlier tonight, I say yes, I know it broke your heart with me saying no, but I want to take a chance, lets get married, if this doesn't work, we can always try again right?'

He kissed me passionately and I laughed as he moved on top of me and said 'That sounds great'. They made love that night and it was the most amazing things we've shared together.

The next morning, Ryu left bed early to get the mail, because he was a morning person and prepared breakfast for her and took a walk around the house to make sure everything was fine. The maid who took care of Machiko, Nolee didn't stay in the house all the time, just when Ryu and I would be out. Ryu cooked breakfast and looked through the mail, there was a letter for Mr. Eba and Ms. Kinomoto, he opened his letter and it was an invitation, he looked at it.

_Ryu Eba_

_You are invited to Syaoran Li's 19th Birthday Party in Japan, Royal Palace. Included in this letter is a plane ticket to Japan. I hope you could make it, and it's not necessary to bring a gift, just bring yourself. _

He read it, thinking it was the letter that I was talking about. He continued to cook dinner, not able to take the situation off his mind. When I would wake up this morning, he would be giving me the ring, and he was so happy that I said yes. He cooked my favorite breakfast, pancakes with Maple syrup and Muesli with Juice, he started walking upstairs with a tray and he kissed her in the forehead and I started waking up, I heard him say to me 'Wake up sleepy head, I made you breakfast'.

I sat up and smiled at him, getting used to the light in the room 'You woke up to make me breakfast?'

'Yeah, come on eat', I started swallowing down the food and I asked him why he wasn't talking 'Something up?'

'I actually got a letter this morning, from Syaoran 's parents, they've invited me to the party', I stopped and he continued 'I don't think you should go, I have a bad feeling about this'.

'Don't worry about it, its nothing …', he hugged me tightly and there was something different in it. I looked down at the tray and there was a box, while I was opening it, I asked 'What 's in here?'.

'Look for yourself, I think you'll like it', I opened it and there was an extravagant ring inside and I gasped.

'Oh my god, its so big'.

'Its too big?'

'Its perfect, but it looks so expensive'.

'Your worth more than that, come on let me put it on you', I smiled as he took the ring from the box and slowly put it on my hand and kissed me passionately. I was so happy that morning and he decided to take a day of work to be with me and Machiko. He had been so amazing lately, he was there for me, and I continued to eat my breakfast by the verandah, giving me a view of the lake. I opened the invitation after Ryu gave me the letter and I looked at the sunrise. Maybe I should bring Ryu with me just in case?

That day, I spent the day with Ryu and he took Machiko and me out to a ride in his boat he owned. He got that boat on his 12th birthday and he was just starting to use it now. While I was holding Machiko in the top part of the boat, Ryu looked at me. I could see in his eyes that this was the kind of life he wanted. He had everything he could possibly have in the world and he couldn't ask for more. Ryu sat beside me and said 'I just want to marry you right now, or maybe we can elope?'

'Elope? I don't think so Ryu'.

'I just want you to be in my life so soon'.

'I am a part of your life', I said, smiling in his eyes. Everyday, he became this guy that grew more handsome, and I couldn't resist him anymore. I was about to say something else to Ryu, but my mobile phone rang and I answered it.

'Hello?'

'Ms. Kinomoto, this is Darien Lopes, you had an interview with me yesterday. I would like to meet you sometime … tomorrow maybe?'

'Yeah sure … does this mean I got the job?'

'I'll tell you when I meet you, so please make it to the Starbucks Café, 10am sharp'.

'Okay, thanks', I smiled brightly at Ryu and he was curious of what was going on. I put Machiko down and I jumped on Ryu and said 'I got the job!'

'You got the job!', he had no idea with what I was talking about.

'I got the job in the fashion industry; remember I had an interview yesterday?

'Yeah, that job', finally getting with what I was talking about, 'You didn't answer my question?'

'What question?', I asked, I couldn't remember what he was asking me.

'No don't worry about it'.

It had been over 4 months since I gave birth to Machiko and Christmas was only a month away. The party for Syaoran was on September 20, and it was only the 6th of September. Everything was going so well, and the job that I got was amazing. Even though Darien's workmates didn't like me I still got in because I had the skills and he loved my designs. Ryu and I were so happy together, we've been engaged or at least a week now. No-one knew of the amazing news except for Ryu's parents, who were ecstatic when they found out. So right now, I was going shopping with Nolee and baby Machiko to get a dress for the party. Somehow I wanted to look my best because I wanted to make a good impression for the new people I might be meeting. Darien even suggested that I should wear one of my designs because he would gladly make a dress for me. But I didn't want to; I just wasn't ready to wear my own designs. Not yet.

While I was in Bondi Junction (a local shopping mall), I tried looking for clothes. I said to Nolee 'Please Nolee you have to help me find clothes, the party is this 20th and I'm so unorganized'

'You want something sexy but something that covers you?'

'Yeah, exactly', we walked into a designer clothes store and I looked through the racks 'Some of these are allright, but its just not me'.

'I bought my formal dress in a store that's not well known but they sell good dresses', leading me into these formal clothes store, I looked around and even though I didn't know the shop well, they looked pretty allright. I started looking through the racks, rummaging through and finally I found the PERFECT DRESS. It was black and it showed off you collarbones. I instantly tried it on and it looked perfect on me and the dress was only $175, and I was definitely getting it. I looked for more dress around in case I changed my mind and these were MY type of clothes, they were sexy but not slutty and they were at the right price.

We took a break and ate muffins and I fed Machiko and we continued on shopping, I looked for shoes, accessories, bags and more and I also shopped for more clothes for Machiko because she just needed new ones. I spoilt Machiko now at then but not always. While we were being driven back home, my phone rang and it was an unrecognizable number. I answered it and said 'Hello?'

'Hello Sakura', it sounded like Nyoko 'I was just wondering if you could make it to the party. Did you get the invitation?'

'Yeah I did and I'm coming', I smiled while I said that 'I hope he wants me there'.

'He definitely does, I'm glad you could come'.

'I've got to go Nyoko, so I guess I'll see you at the party?'

'Yeah, I'll see you'.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

Tomorrow night was the 19th of October, they day I would be leaving and right now, I was in Ryu's arms having a rest just after we made love. Earlier tonight Ryu's parents came over and we had dinner altogether and it was amazing. I actually felt like I was in a real family, then it made me start to think about my mother. I haven't seen her in months, it wasn't my choice not to see her but she blocked us out of her life. Ryu had been so amazing to me because he kept giving me all these gifts and he just wanted me to be happy, but I had a feeling that he was doing this to try and prevent what was going to happen in Japan. I woke up in his arms and he was already awake, he kissed me good morning and said 'Good morning sleepy head'.

I smiled up at him and said 'Good morning to you too, how long have you been up?'

'Just now – I know your leaving now but I want us to go out for breakfast before you go to the airport allright?'

'Is everything okay?', I asked, he seemed like he was hiding something.

'Nothings up, just want to have breakfast with you'.

'Okay …', I got out of bed and went to the bathroom and started turning on the water on the bath-tub and he came up behind me.

'Your so beautiful do you know that?'

'No, tell me why Ryu', I was teasing him and I could see him looking down my naked body.

'Because you've got these perfect boobs, amazingly sexy bottom', he squeezed my bum 'And your just one of a kind', he kissed me passionately by my neck and he said 'I don't know what I would do without you'.

'Well, I'm going to be gone for a week, try and survive'.

'I though you were only staying for a couple of days?'

'I want to look around, so that doesn't matter right?', I went in the bath-tub and he came in with me a couple of moments later, I enjoyed my time with him and we faced each other talking about our deepest secret. But there would be one secret I would never ever tell a soul, and it was that I might still have feelings for Syaoran . I couldn't bear tell anyone because once Ryu hears it from someone else it would break his heart, and he was SERIOUSLY in love with me.

He took me out for breakfast and Machiko was there eating her baby food. Having a family was the most amazing gift I could ever get. Sometimes it made me think, what life would be if I never met Ryu, never fell in love with Syaoran and Ryu and if I had an abortion. My life would never be the same. Going to this party would mean I would be missing out on a week of work but that was allright because I was new, and Darien wanted me to look at the fashion in Japan while I was there.

I looked into Ryu's eyes, they weren't a boy's eyes anymore, it was a man's eyes and the way he looked at me now & then made me blush 'Ryu, there's something in your cheeks', I stood up my from my chair and removed it ketchup on his face. Even though he was a man now, he was still a young kid, there was a part of him I would never forget, the way he loved me through the though situations we've been through.

We were now at the airport and I was hugging him tightly, I needed to go if I wasn't going to leave any soon, but my daughter Machiko didn't want to go. Her first words to me was _Mum_ and it was so adorable. Then it was Ryu's turn, I hugged him tightly and I said 'I'm going to miss you so much'.

'I'm going to miss you too', he said softly to me 'But I want you to have fun there and tell Syaoran and his parents that I said hi'.

'I will', I knew that inside of him, he wanted me to promise that nothing was going to happen while I was Japan but I couldn't control that.


	11. Chapter 11

' … '**Means they are saying something. A conversation.**

" … " _means they are thinking. Their thoughts._

**Chapter 11**

As soon as I got to Japan, Nyoko was there and she had a car waiting for me. I walked to her and she was so happy to see me. Nyoko said 'I'm so glad you could come, Kin was supposed to be here but he's still at work'.

'Its allright', we walked towards the limo and we got in.

'You could stay at this exclusive hotel', giving her a week day of free accommodation in the hotel. 'How long are you planning on staying?'

I faced her and said 'A week at least'.

'What are you going to be doing for the rest of the week?'

'I'm going to be doing my work, my boss Darien wants me to look at fashion around here in Japan'.

'The party is on tomorrow but I'd like you to help us in the palace, just for the last minute. The planner had been really fussy and I don't think its Syaoran's style. I don't think he even likes it'.

I laughed and I asked 'What makes you say that?'

'Well every time I ask Syaoran if he liked the decorations, he would just give me this look'. I could tell that Nyoko wanted to ask me why Ryu didn't come with me.

'I'm sorry Ryu couldn't come. He's really been busy with work; I didn't want to take him off work since he loves it'.

'Sakura I just really want to thank you for being here, it's really going to mean a lot to him, its just he's been depressed lately and it is just getting out of control'.

'Well I hope he's glad to see me', the limo stopped, I got out and I stood in front this lavish hotel and I looked at Nyoko 'Thanks for letting me stay here'.

Nyoko hugged me and said 'I'm just glad you're here'.

I entered the hotel room and I thought to myself "Damn this hotel room is so big", and it had a great view of the city. I looked around and I put my stuff down. The first thing I did was go on the side-bed to call Ryu.

'Hello?' he asked.

'It's me dummy, I just got here and I'm staying at a magnificent hotel here, how is Machiko?'

'She's been crying lately, I'm starting to get worried, I think she's sick'.

'Take her to a doctor then', I didn't want my baby to get sick.

'I can't, its getting too late, so how do you like Japan?' he was currently having dinner with his mates.

'Its fine, though I feel weird, tomorrow I'm going to be seeing him'.

'Sakura, before you left, I wanted to ask you something', I didn't have a good feeling of what he was going to say.

'Whatever it is, just ask me'.

'Do you still have any feelings for Syaoran at all, any?' I couldn't believe that he just asked me, just like that.

'Uh – what make you ask that Ryu?'

'I don't know, I just want to know that answer, it doesn't matter, and I just want the truth out of you'.

'No, of course not, I'm with you right?', I lied through my teeth, even though I felt guilty, I couldn't just tell him that I still had feelings for Syaoran, because we were ENGAGED?

'Okay, it's good to hear, I hope you have fun tomorrow'.

'Well I'll try, take care of Machiko'.

'Yeah I will I'll bring her to the doctor first thing the next morning'.

'Okay, I love you'.

'I love you too, I've got to go, the guys are probably wondering where I am'.

'Okay bye', I dropped the phone and I decided to take a relaxing bubble bathe. I walked towards the bathroom and I used their hotel supplies. I stripped naked and I slid in the bath-tub and I relaxed.

Breakfast was served in my room that morning and it was delicious. Today was the party and I was going to the palace early to help with the decorations. Apparently Syaoran wasn't going to be around since he was getting his tuxedo in the City. I took a cab to the palace and Kin was still there but he was going to be rushing off work.

'Sakura, the planner is already here, it's nice of you to be here, but I've got to rush now. I'll see you tonight?'

'Kin, I was just wondering where's Kado and Sachi?'

'They're in America, visiting the president, he isn't so well'.

'So they won't be here for the party?'

'Don't worry Sakura, dear they won't be here, I've got to rush', he walked to a black car and I watched it drove away.

I now didn't know where I was going because I had no idea who this 'Planner' was, so I asked one of the butler in the palace 'Excuse me, do you know where the Birthday Planner is?'

'Ma'am he's over there, his name is Gerald'.

'Okay, thank you very much'.

I looked around the place and it wasn't so bad, but it just wasn't Syaoran's style. Gerald bump onto me because I wasn't looking where I was going 'Sorry', I apologized.

'You must be young Sakura?'

I nodded 'Yeah, Nyoko wanted me to be here to help you'.

'Yeah, so how do you like it?'

'Its fine in some bits –', we continued walking 'But it could be better, there could be a stage where the band would be performing'.

'Yeah, wait a minute I'll list it down', he started writing down my ideas.

'Lights in the gazebo, around there', I pointed to the garden 'A drink area too'.

'Okay, I'll try and get all that … I've heard about your history with this handsome Prince, are you coming tonight?'

'Yeah …'

'Girl you better stay away from the press, they will do ANYTHING to get a picture of you & Prince Syaoran together'.

'Okay … he's not around is he?'

'He's still upstairs, he's about to leave, though he's running a little late', I nodded at him and I was going to just go and say hi to him. I went up to his bedroom and I knocked softly.

'Come in the door is open', I slowly opened the door and he came out of the toilet, half naked and he looked like he just washed his face, 'I thought you were already changed, I'm sorry', I was hiding my face so he couldn't recognize me.

'Its okay …', he quickly out a shirt one and he asked 'Are you one of the decorating people?', I put my hand down and a look of shock developed in his handsome face, 'Sakura?'

I smiled warmly at him and said 'Hi, your mother invited me to the party, you wouldn't mind if I come tonight right?', I could tell from the look in his face he was still shocked. I tried to get a word out of him but he was just TOO shock.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

He stepped back and he asked 'What?'

'I saw your mother in Australia and she told me that you were having a party'.

He looked straight at me and it was hard for him to say anything to me 'Why'd you come?'

'What do you mean, you don't want me here?'

'I do', he said to me 'There's got to be a reason why you're here'.

'Can't I see a friend?', I asked him, he was saddened by the fact that I only called him a FRIEND, nothing more.

'So what about the things that happened in the past, are we just going to put it all behind us?'

'No – please Ryu don't do this, I just want us to be back to normal, like we were before?'

'We can't do that', he told me 'It will never be the same between us two …'

I started getting angry, regretting that I ever came here 'I don't even know why I cam here Syaoran, your all being stubborn, I'm trying to be nice to you, but all your doing is rejecting me. Remember it wasn't my fault we couldn't be together. YOU had all that time to tell me, then you tell me you love me when I'm with someone else'.

'For god sakes Sakura, we slept together!'

'And it didn't mean anything!', I shouted at him. I just had to let it all out. After I released all my anger at him I walked out of his room, so pissed. I wasn't planning on going to his stupid party anymore after the conversation we just had.

I went back to my hotel room, because I needed to cool down. I was still so angry at him, then someone knocked on my door. I walked towards the door and Nyoko was at the door, I smiled at her and said 'Hello', and I welcomed her in.

She walked towards the balcony and she said to me 'I heard about what happened at the palace today … you are still planning on going tonight right?'

'I don't know anymore, talking to him earlier just got me so angry, its like I did something wrong but I didn't'.

'He still loves you', she said softly.

I asked, since I was so confused 'What?'

'He's still in love with you, ever since you two stop talking to each other it got worst … and maybe him seeing again might make him react different with what you expected'.

'Nyoko, I can't be with him, I'm engaged to Ryu, he just asked me recently, and we have a family together'.

She looked at me in the eye and said 'Ryu isn't the real father of Machiko, I know'.

'How?', I was shocked that she even knew, because we barely talked to each other and now she knew so much about me.

'I just now, I had a feeling that Kado & Sachi forced you to stop seeing Syaoran because it would cause a scandal'.

'I'll try and make it tonight, but no promises', we were by the door and Nyoko hugged me tightly 'I'm glad you came here, I needed the talk'.

'Your welcome dear …'I shut the door and it was only 3pm, and the party was not going to start till 8pm, so I decided to go to a Spa Centre and just relax. I needed it so bad.

Back in the Royal Palace

It was around 5pm, and Syaoran just got back from the City from getting his suit. He was so mad at his mother for not telling him that Sakura was coming. So when he got home, he went to the main office and burst into his mother 'I can't believe you didn't tell me that Sakura was coming!'

'I'm sorry … I wanted it to be a surprise present for you. I just had a talk with and she's engaged'

'With who?'

'With Ryu, they got engaged just before she left for Japan', Syaoran sadly looked at his mother, 'If you really love her you can at least treat her nicely. You weren't very polite this morning'.

'She got me so angry'.

'Well what did you expect? For her to run in your arms again? Remember it was your decision not to see her again, she was probably expecting you back, but you just weren't there'.

'You don't know how much I love her … Right now I would do anything for her'.

'Then why didn't you tell her that?'

'It was just too late.

That night I didn't end up going to the party, so I stayed at my hotel, watching TV, just boringly flicking through the channels. I had nothing else to do. But I still had to stay a week more in Japan to do my job. I noticed that the time was around 8.30 and I decided to go downstairs to have dinner, as I was going out and I was about to open my door, Syaoran was right there. I wondered what he was doing there and I asked 'Why are you doing here, don't you have a party to go on right now?'

'I don't want to be there because your not there', he smiled and said 'I was expecting you there and'.

'You should be there –'.

'Sakura I love you, please give me another chance', he stood so close to me that I started stepping back. I closed the door behind me and he looked at me 'I'll do anything, please, give me another chance', I leaned against the wall and he slowly bent his head to kiss me but I turned away.

'We can't do this … - I don't want to do this to Ryu, I love him'.

'But its not the same love you feel for me …', he kissed me passionately and started pushing me towards the wall and I wrapped my leg around his waist as he pulled me up, his hands supporting my weight.

'Syaoran – ', I moaned, as he started kissing towards my neck and going down. He moved me to the bed and with him on top of me then he slowly, started taking off my clothes, watching me as he was doing it. Again, he kissed me in my neck and I was already naked under him and I thought to myself "Please don't let this be a bad decision", then I made love with Syaoran that night. Over and over again because he missed me so much, but I didn't know how to feel.

When we were finished, I was lying in his arms and I looked at my fingers, the ring on my wedding finger, I was breaking the trust I had with Ryu. I couldn't face him anymore now that I slept with Syaoran even though I was already engaged. I slowly turned the other way so my back was facing Syaoran's face and we talked.

'Syaoran I don't think we did the right thing', I said to him, I was ashamed of what I have done, but it had filled in the missing pieces of my life I've been looking for, for months 'What if the same thing happens again?'

'What do you mean the same thing? Were you pregnant with my child?'

'Her name is Machiko, and yes she's your child'.

'Why didn't you tell me?', I stood up and wrapped the bed sheets around my petite body. 'You already knew it, you knew it inside, and that's why you made me make the choice because you know we couldn't raise it together'.

'Sakura … lets leave now, right now', he stood behind me and hugged me tightly. These moments I was having with him was beautiful and I don't think I could ever forget it. 'Let's elope, just us two … I don't care about my throne anymore', I smiled at what he was saying, Nyoko was right all along, Syaoran still had feelings for me and it would never go away. I was starting to think if I should leave Ryu, but I loved him, but at the same time I loved Syaoran. Now all of the sudden my life was going to get more complicated than usual.

We made love once more before we finally slept peacefully together and the next morning, I found myself naked, under the sheets and Syaoran was already out of bed. I couldn't believe this, he left this morning without even leaving me any sort of note. I felt like I was just a one night stand Syaoran just had, but he was a better person than that. I took a shower and when I finished changing I started packing up my things, I was leaving Tokyo today, and I was going to Kyoto to look around there, maybe stay there for a day then go back home. But just as I was leaving that morning to get my tickets in the airport, I turned on the television and it wasn't going so well back in Australia. There were news reports that there was a big fire in NSW and it was quickly spreading South and now, the fire was leading into the Beach area, and that's where I lived. I quickly panicked and I dialed the home number and no-one was answering. I started panicking; Ryu and Machiko could be seriously hurt.

I decided that for now Ryu and Machiko was going to come first, so I quickly took the first flight back to Australia, and it was long. I sat in the plane wondering, and sick worried on how Ryu and Machiko was, then I remembered. Ryu was a firefighter and he would have to leave to help bring down the fire, and I started getting so worried. I got the Sydney, Airport and it was hectic there, tourists wanted to get out of the country before the situation got worst and I got in a cab and I got driven straight to the North Shores. When I got to the house, Nolee, baby Machiko, Taro and Mai was in there and I hugged my baby and I asked Mai 'Where's Ryu?'

'He's doing he's work, he's out there'.

'Is it safe to be here?', I looked around they haven't started moving.

'Yeah, the wind doesn't blow our away and its pretty far away from where the fire is', Taro answered.

'How long have Ryu been working?'

'Ever since the fire started, I think that's the reason why Machiko started getting sick because of the change of air', Nolee answered.

'Can you contact him?'

'No-one has been able to contact him for days, but he's fine', I looked out the window and the sky was so dark now, it was just starting to darken up. I decided to stay all night because I couldn't stop thinking about Ryu, wondering if he was allright. I couldn't handle it if he was hurt in anyway.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

_Italic font means they're thinking it._

The next morning I woke up, still so sick worried about Ryu. I went to the room next door and checked up on my daughter Machiko, she was sleeping so peacefully and I kissed her in the forehead and I slowly walked downstairs. Lately, Ryu's parents have been around to support me through this tough time, they were here for me anytime and I loved that about his family, they were all so close. Taro (Ryu's dad) was a morning person and by the time I got there, he was already drinking coffee by the benchtop and he said to me 'Good morning'.

'Hey', I smiled at him and I asked 'I never knew you were a morning person?'

'Not much people don't usually know … are you doing anything today?', I took a cup of coffee and sat next to him.

'No … not today, I was just thinking of spending time with my daughter, take her out to a park?'

'That sounds great', I smiled, I really missed Ryu so much and I just wanted to kiss him and hug him right now 'You haven't heard anything from Ryu have you?'

'No … but I've been meaning to ask you, how was the party?'

'What party?', I asked, I didn't know that Ryu told his parents about the party.

'The party in Japan, my son told me and I just want to know whether or not you had fun?'

'It was great', I missed out the part when I slept with Syaoran, it would just be too much. I was cheating on Ryu, but I didn't mean for it to happen, I just want to tell Ryu the whole truth, and so that we could put this all behind us. Right now I was so angry by the fact that Syaoran left me the next morning without even leaving me any sort of note. Though Syaoran desperately tried to call me late last night, but I wasn't answering my mobile, I was so angry.

By the time it was around 9.30 am, people around the house started waking up and luckily it was Sunday, and it wasn't a busy day. I just took Machiko to the park and I had fun with her, and she was so cute. I didn't realize that my little baby was growing up so quickly. When I got back to the house, I realized that there was someone else in the house, because their car was parked by the garage and I wondered who it was. I entered the room and I saw Dennis, and he was still in his uniform. I smiled at Dennis but I was wondering where Ryu was. 'Hi Dennis', I said smiling brightly at him.

Dennis kissed me by the cheeks and said 'I need to talk to you Sakura'.

'What is it?', I started to get worried, I just wanted to know what was wrong.

'Its about Ryu', my eyes started to water up and I could feel tears building up in my eyes and a part of me wanted to hear it, but a part of me didn't 'We were by the North Shores and something terrible happened to him, he was trying to help a family, and the parents left their baby in the house, he went in to save a baby and the house fell on him'.

'Did you find him?'

'No, I'm sorry Sakura', I felt Dennis hug me tightly and my knees started weakening, and I fell to the ground with him. I couldn't believe this, he was gone forever and there was nothing I could do.

'Oh god! Why did this happen to him, why him?', I started crying hard in Dennis' arms and Mai, Taro and Machiko just looked at me, sympathetically. Then I felt Machiko tugging on my dress.

'Mummy what's wrong?', I pulled away from Dennis' hug and I hugged my daughter, she would have to live without a father now. Ryu was now gone and we were engaged. Now I regretted not marrying him, after he said to me so many times that he wanted the two of us to elope. I now wanted to do that but now he was gone.

Dennis stood up and said 'I'm sorry about this Sakura, but I've got to go back to work … the fire is still spreading quickly and once again, I'm sorry. Someone might come over later on the day about the paper work', he gave me one hug before he left and Mai hugged me tightly and I started crying in her arms.

Syaoran's grandmother just got back from America and he wanted a word with him. Sachi heard that Syaoran & Sakura slept together when Sakura was in Japan and she couldn't believe this happened. Syaoran just got back from a party that he went to with his parents and Sachi called Syaoran's mobile phone, demanding him to come to her office to talk about what happened. Now Syaoran was walking towards the office knowing he would be getting a big lecture, and he knocked softly and he said 'Its me grandma', he opened the door slightly.

'Come in Syaoran, I need to talk to you about this', throwing several pictures of Sakura and him talking in his bedroom.

'How did you get this?'

'I've got my sources … I told her to stay away from you', Sachi was getting angry about this whole love triangle, she wanted to do something that would settle all these problems 'I'm finding you a wife to marry'.

'What?'

'From now on you have an arranged marriage and your getting married as soon as you turn 20'.

'What? Me getting married with who?', he was now getting angry with the whole situation.

'A nice young girl, her name is Kohana Williams, she's half American and half Japanese. I met her during my stay in America, she's a nice girl'.

'I will not marry some girl you just met'.

'I'm not giving you a choice'.

'Then I don't want to be Prince', he stood up aggressively 'Ever since you came into my life, all you've done is made decisions for me. I never got a choice, and if I ever did, I would have never agreed to come to Japan with you', he walked out of that office so angry, and he called Sakura's mobile phone but she wasn't picking up. He figured that she was angry at him, but it wasn't his fault, he had to rush back to the palace because he didn't want her to get busted since Kado & Sachi came back early from their trip.

A couple of days later

A funeral was going to be held in honor of Ryu Eba. My life was going to be so different now with him out of my life because, he was the ONE. As I sat in front I watched as time repeats again, how this is the second funeral I would be going to because of my father before. I didn't bother to see who was there that day, after the funeral was held, I went straight home and I took a boat to a lake and when I was in the middle, I just thought of what me and Ryu had. It was really and truly amazing, Ryu would do anything for me, and I wondered why I didn't. I took of my engagement ring and I looked at it and I said 'I wish you were here Ryu', then I slowly dropped it in the lake. I couldn't believe this happened, then I just watched as the rain started pouring down … mixed with my tears.

I looked back at the house and I saw a shadow or a person dressed in dark clothing, but when I blinked, that person was gone. I wondered if I was going crazy, I rowed back to the house and there was so many flowers around that people sent to show their sympathy, but I didn't need all of it, because it just makes it harder for me to get over him. Then I heard someone's voice behind me 'How are you doing Sakura?', I instantly recognized whose voice it was so I turned around and he hugged me tightly.

'What are you doing here Syaoran?'

'I heard about what happened and I came here for you … I'm so sorry Sakura'.

'We shouldn't do this Syaoran, Ryu just died … please don't', I cried as Syaoran got closer to me.

'I'm getting married to Kohana Williams, Sachi wants me to marry her', I turned my back on him hearing what he just said and it was unbelievable 'I don't want to do'.

'Syaoran I want to be out of your life now … we can't keep doing this, running to each other's arms every time we see each other … this is it', I said, then suddenly I saw the door open and it was Nolee with my daughter Machiko, so I said to Nolee 'Nolee please bring Machiko to her room'.

'Yes ma'am', Nolee said, taking young Machiko and leading her upstairs.

Then there was silence, Syaoran looked at them walk away and said 'She's my daughter isn't she?'

'Yeah, but Syaoran, its not like she's your actual daughter, you were never there, Ryu was … because he loved me that much to stick with me no matter what'.

'But Ryu's dead isn't he?', he snapped, and I couldn't believe this was happening. Now that Ryu was dead, Syaoran wanted a chance with me.

'How dare you Syaoran, you could never compare to what me and Ryu had'.

'If you loved him, why did we make love'.

'It was an accident … I was confused, I was depressed and you were at my door'.

'That's what you said before … you know Sakura, I don't get why you don't love me but, I love you so much it hurts deep inside, and don't you at least have any feelings for me … any at all ?', he paused, waiting for me to answer, but I wasn't going to be asked like this 'I guess this is it', I started crying more as he said that, then I heard the door close and he left. This was the end for us, but inside me this wasn't going to be the end. Syaoran loved me so much that he was willing to wait till I changed my mind, but will he really?

When I got back to work, Darien didn't give me such a hard time and there was news everywhere that Syaoran Li and Kohana Williams were currently engaged and I couldn't believe that. The Japanese Royal Committee were really happy about this news because finally the prince was settling down and started taking his role as a Prince, and worst of all Darien knew Kohana because she was a frequent dress buyer from this company and right now, I was listening to Darien explaining that to me, Darien started 'I know you've heard about the knew and its all true Sakura, Kohana will come and visit us later on in the day to pick designs for her engagement evening gown, but I'll think she'll be impressed with what you've have to offer because you have the same taste'.

'What … you mean she's on her way right now?', then there was a knock at the door.

Darien said 'Come in', then this gorgeous girl Kohana walked in and Darien said 'Sakura, Kohana I want you to meet each other', Kohana smiled nicely at me and I smiled back at her, then she sat at the other chair 'I'm glad we got us three in the same room, so Sakura, show her your designs'.

I stood up and said 'Well the colour of the season is purple and lately silk and lace has been popular. I was wondering this dress would be nice', showing this elegant dress for her'.

'This designs are amazing, but I don't fancy what everyone is wearing at the moment, I was something unique and elegant', she spoke to me and she continued 'I'd like to help design my evening gown and my wedding dress'.

I looked at Darien and he said 'Sure, whatever, as long as its what you want Ms. Williams', but I didn't know what to say, I just stood up, doing nothing. When Kohana left because he had to meet up with Syaoran's parents for lunch in the City, I just sat in my office, thinking, Kohana wasn't a bad person, but now I'm not so sure if I want him to get married. So I dialed his mobile phone and no-one was answering, then I text him and it said _can we please meet tonight, I know your in town, Syaoran its urgent. _As soon as I sent that text, he replied _MEET ME IN TOWNHALL STATION AT 8.50, I'LL BE THERE._


	14. Chapter 14

Please write reviews or I won't be writing any more chapters for this story. I'm also trying to make the chapters a bit longer so you'll be able to read more.

Ta.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 14

I wasn't sure that I should have done that, but it was 8 pm and I was in my car driving to Townhall Station. I feel so guilty, but I love Syaoran so much that right now I couldn't see him with another girl. I was 40 minutes away from Townhall and I tried and drove calmly.

Syaoran was just getting out of a shop with Kohana, because his grandparents have been annoying him so much about getting a proper ring for Kohana and to shut them up, he did it. It had been 4 hours since he text back Sakura about meeting each other, then he looked at Kohana, she looked at him since she couldn't figure out why he was so quiet lately 'Come on tell me what's wrong, you've been quiet all afternoon ever since we had dinner with you parents … tell me'

'Its nothing', he looked at her 'I'm just thinking about you', he lied through his teeth, he wasn't even thinking about Kohana 'Look I'm meeting some of my high school friends around this area, boys night'.

She smiled brightly at him and asked 'Is that all … okay then, have fun', kissing him passionately in the lips and when she pulled away, she walked to the limo. He looked at his watch and he thought _'I hope I make it in time'._ Then he raised his hand and a cab stopped right in front of him.

I was waiting in a bench right in front of the station and I was waiting, there was 5 more minutes to go and I said to myself 'I hope I'm doing the right thing'.

'You are', I turned around and there was Syaoran and he looked more handsome than usual. He sat next to me and I felt awkward 'What did you want to talk about?'

'Can we go somewhere else, somewhere private', I stood up and I said 'My cars right there, we can take my car', he took the cars from my hands and he was driving.

We were in the car together and he said 'Okay, we're stopping', he parked the car by a park near a lake.

'I don't know where to start', I said as soon as I got out of the car, I really didn't know where to start because I couldn't just tell him that I love him 'Where's Kohana?'

'She thinks I'm with my boys', we sat under a tree and he looked at me with his amazing brown eyes 'Whatever you want to tell me, just tell me'.

'I don't – I', I couldn't tell him and thank god his phone rang, he answered it and it was Kohana, five minutes later he ended the phone call and I looked back at him, he moved forward towards me and he kissed me passionately, a kiss he's never given me before, it was different and I could feel the passion in his kiss. I whispered to him 'I wanted to tell you that I don't want you to get married …'

'Sakura I can't get out of it … its impossible, because if I do, then you know what will happen, people will blame and I couldn't handle that, its already enough that my grandmother hates you I can't handle anyone else hating you', we were so close to each other that I could feel him breathing, then I couldn't handle it, I kissed him passionately and I started being gently pushed down in the soft grass and he was on top of me. Luckily it was getting dark and not much people were around.

'We can't do this here Syaoran, someone might walk past'.

'Okay lets go to your place'.

We got to my old place because I didn't want Machiko seeing what I was doing, so I got to my sister's place, but I still had a room there. Aiko and Makoto were around but they were having dinner, and I said to Aiko as I came in the house 'You wouldn't mind if I stay here tonight right Aiko?', she gave me a look and Syaoran came up behind me.

Aiko stood up and hugged Syaoran 'Oh my god Syaoran, its been a while, its good to see you, I heard you were engaged'.

'I am', he said to my sister.

'Why don't you join us for dinner, Sakura and Syaoran?', Makoto suggested to us.

'Sure', I said and Aiko got us food and I sat next to Syaoran as we started eating. Makoto was now a cook after he just finished his cooking degree last year and he was a chef now. I smiled at Makoto, I've gotten used to Aiko and Makoto being together and they've been together ever since high school and I thought that was so adorable.

Aiko was so happy as we all four ate together, 'We've got good news to tell you two …', I wondered what it was then she continued 'I'm engaged', showing me her extravagant ring and she said 'I can't believe it ay Sakura?'

I said 'Congratulations, when did this happen?'

'Last Friday, we didn't want to tell you the, but I'm so excited', my sister said, but Makoto stood up and got more wine bottles. They had renovated the house and it looked amazing and the kitchen looked so much better because Makoto wanted a good kitchen.

After dinner, while Makoto and Aiko was cleaning up the kitchen, I was in the toilet and I asked Syaoran to wait in my room, and when I went in, the room was filled with candles and he smiled sexily at me as I closed the door behind me. He walked to me and he kissed me passionately and he pushed me to the wall gently as I moaned 'Oh god', then he started taking off my clothes and once I was naked, he lifted me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist, then he lifted me and slowly put me in my soft bed, I watched him as he started taking the rest of his clothes and all I could remember that night was it was amazing. We made love more than once and after that, we talked, thinking about the past and what may happen in the future, then when I heard him saying 'I love you', I smiled at him and he pulled me more tightly to him.

'I love you too', I said to him as I slowly fell asleep in his strong muscular arms.

The next morning, Syaoran actually stayed in bed with me and he was still peacefully asleep and I whispered to him 'Wake up sleepy head, its late'.

'Oh my god what time is it?', I looked at my mobile phone and it was around 2.00pm, then I had a lot of missed calls from Nolee's mobile and I wondered what was wrong. So I called the home phone and I waited 'Nolee, what happened is everything allright … why did you call me?'

'Its Machiko she's not well madam'.

'Oh no … did you bring her to the hospital or get checked up?'

'I called in Dr. Black … and so far he told me that she has a fever', I started getting changed and I was going to be on my way to the house, 'Okay I'll be there as soon as I can … how is she now?'

'She's sleeping', I sighed, but I was still worried by the fact that my little angle was sick. This was the first time she had ever gotten sick. As soon as I hanged up the mobile, I was changing so quickly and I saw Syaoran just starting to wake up 'I have to go, I'm sorry'.

'Can I call you?'

'Yeah … tonight, but I've got a party for work I've got to go to', he stood up and butt naked and he kissed me passionately 'But try and not be seen on your way out … they'll make a big deal out of it'.

'Okay', he kissed me one last time before I rushed out of the door, he started getting changed knowing that Kohana was probably wondering where the hell he was and now he would have to make up some dumb excuse that he got drunk but wants to assure her that totally nothing happened. He looked around for his clothes, since last night was so wild and he came across my diary … it looked like it was around 16 years old time and it was very girly in the outside, he was tempted to look at it, but he couldn't, and there was another photo of Ryu, me, Makoto and Aiko and they looked so happy together. He looked around her room and smiled, it brang him to times when they were so young and he remembered the necklace he gave me for their friendship way back then, then he started having flashbacks of those times.

(meaning flashbacks)

Syaoran and me were just walking out of a school football game and our home team won and everyone around was so happy. Syaoran just knew just a couple of weeks ago that he was leaving but there wasn't going to be any he would tell me today because he wasn't going to ruin it. We were going to my house now because they were planning to watch a movie that he brought with him today. That day I was also still angry with Ryu because we just had one of those relationship fights and that he wasn't pulling his weight and also that Ryu was barely around. I closed the door and he helped me make popcorn. Syaoran and I had this special relationship of friendship that I would never forget … we were there for each other.

We sat down and started watching the movie and I laid my head in his lap as we started watching Match Point. It was a great movie and we constantly commented on the story line 'Oh my god … that's so gay', I said.

'I know ay', then he looked at me and he said 'I've got something to give you … I've been meaning to give it to you for a while now'.

'What is it?', I asked eager to know what it was.

'Its this', showing me this necklace I've been wanting, I turned around so that he could put it on and he asked 'Do you like it?'

'I love it … but how did you know I wanted it?'

'I saw the look in your eyes when we passed that shop and you coulnd't take your eyes off it', I laughed giddily, then I gave him those hugs, were it feels like there more to it than a hug.

Syaoran snapped out of his thought when Makoto knocked on the door, he asked Syaoran 'Aiko's gone to work but I'm cooking breakfast … would you like some?'

He answered back 'Yeah sure … I'll be down in a few minutes', he started changing quickly then he later had breakfast with Makoto and he complimented him for being such a good cook.

As soon as I got to my car I rushed home, I was worried about my baby thinking of how she was and when I got there, Nolee was there and I burst in the door and said 'Is she allright?'

Nolee said to me 'She's been sleeping for at least 2 hours good', I went upstairs and I gently opened the door making sure not to make any sudden noises and I kissed her in the cheeks 'Is she taking any medicine?', I asked Nolee when I closed the door, we talked in the kitchen as she started making lunch.

'Someone came over the house and I think her name was Kohana and she looked like she really needed to talk to you … I told her you were out with friends', Nolee informed me as I sat down by the bench.

'What did she say?'

'She was telling me to leave a message for you about the party tonight … she said to get her some kind of dress I don't know, I can't be here for the rest of the week, I'm going out with my sister, we're going camping'.

'Okay, I'll just leave Machiko by Ryu's parents … I mean', I realized that I couldn't continue with what I was saying. I couldn't call Ryu's parents anymore everytime I couldn't take care of Machiko so I said 'I'll leave her with my sister'.

'Okay … I was so worried that I couldn't go because its seems so late to tell you'.

'Don't worry, did my dress come from Darien?'

'Its in your bedroom … I have to go, I just cooked lunch so yeah', cleaning up the benches before she took her bag and left. I loved Nolee as a person because she was dependable and she actually did her work well. Even though she was still at a young age, she was very mature and understood the situation that I was currently in.

I walked to my bedroom and I saw this gorgeous dress by my bed. It was amazing and I just sort of looked at it, trying to imagine how I looked in it. Today was really hot and so I just took a long relaxing bathe, smiling and thinking to myself what an amazing night yesterday was. I couldn't forget how romantic Syaoran was last night and he wasn't rushing, most guys rush and try to get things over, but we took our time, making love to each other, caressing each other, then after that talking of how things would be different for us. This could be the only time I was happy being with Syaoran.

Syaoran was just about to enter the hotel where Kohana was waiting and she didn't look so happy. He closed the door behind him and she asked him 'Where have you been Syaoran, I've been worried about you and you just come back at 3?'

'I was out with friends and the night got wild', he lied, but he couldn't just tell her that he was cheating on her, it would break his heart.

She sighed deeply and said 'With who? I called your friends, the ones your parents told me about and they told me that they haven't even seen you for years'.

'What do you want me to say then?'

She urged me 'Tell me the truth and we're about to get married you know, the least I want from you is your lies … now where were you?'

'I saw an old friend and we talked'.

'Talked?', she suspiciously asked him 'What do you mean by talking and who was THIS old friend of yours'.

'It doesn't matter but we just talked, and the night was long – I', before he could say anything else he stopped realizing that he might have said way too much.

'Okay … well I was wondering if you were still going tonight, I want my friends to meet you', he walked over to her and kissed her in the cheeks 'Please dress nicely'.

'I'm just going to take a shower, it won't start till 5 right?' he asked before entering the bathroom.

'No so go fix yourself', she said to him, and he shut the door. When Syaoran was taking his shirt off, he could smell Sakura's perfume and it was very sexy and erotic, it made him remember what happened last night and he wanted to meet her again tonight, but he realized that she had plans tonight.

I put on the dress and I was picked up by a car and I was going to have to go to the party early because I would have to go there extra early, to have a look on things before more people came. As I got out of the car, Darien held his hand out to help me out and he kissed me by the cheeks and he whispered to me ear (We were just friends) 'You look amazing', I smiled at I started walking with him towards the party.

'You look amazing too you know … people haven't started coming yet right?'

'No I don't think so but tonight is going to be big', I smiled Darien, I was such in a happy mood ever since last night. He noticed it.

'How come you're so happy today?'

'Nothing … I'm just so happy', I was walking, with him, and something caught my breath. I was walking then I saw this guy that looked so much like Ryu, like a reincarnation. I just stopped and looked at him, then I asked 'Darien, who's that guy in that white tuxedo?'

'Oh him', pointing to that guy 'His name is Tomo Okashi, he's a newcomer in the film industry, and he's a very skilled swordsman'.

'I've never seen him before why … and he'

'Wait let me guess, reminds you of Ryu, people say that a lot about him', he smiled at her 'Want me to introduce you to him?', as we started walking over to that handsome young man.

'Sure', I said, and I smiled warmly at Tomo as he looked at me, he looked like he was around 17, and I was around 22 now.

Darien said 'Hi Tomo, I want you to meet my dear friend and one of my employees, Sakura Kinomoto, she's a great designer'.

Tomo kissed me in the cheeks to say hello and he said 'Its nice to meet you'.

Darien said 'Well you two talk while I'll have one last look at everything before the party starts', then I was left there with Tomo in a sticky situation because I really didn't know the guy and it was just terribly awkward.

I smiled at Tomo and said 'Darien told me that you're a swordsman, how long have you been training?'

'Not very long … I just started late last year and I loved it', he smiled ant we started walking around. I felt myself getting really comfortable around Tomo and those blue eyes he had were so beautiful, I just wanted to look at them all night.

For the next 10 minutes, more people came, and the party looked so glamorous and there were so many paparazzi there that night, luckily there was strict security so people attending the party had their privacy. I was sitting with Tomo by the tables and I was laughing at his jokes, tonight we made a _REAL_ connection that I've never felt with anyone before, but I had to know how old it was and it was the subject I've been trying to avoid, but it just kept getting back at me, so I had to ask him 'Tomo, not to be rude or anything but I was wondering how old you are?'

'I'm 17'.

'So you haven't even graduated?'

'No, but I am this year, why do you ask?'

'I'm just wondering'.

'Okay …', then I saw Kohana just come in the party and I thought to myself _"Great I guess she's going to be here tonight"_ then a person came up behind her and it was Syaoran, and I was wondering what he was doing here. I told him I was going to a party and he didn't tell me and now we were both stuck in the same party. I just hope he won't come talking to me tonight because it would be too risky. Too many people would be seeing the connections or the feelings I had towards Syaoran, and I heard Tomo ask me 'Is everything allright, you look a bit shocked and confused?'

'Everything is fine, I just saw a friend', I smiled at him. God he was so hot, even though he was young and still 17, he was way mature about so much situations.

'You want to go and say hi to them, I'll be right here?', he suggested.

'No I'm fine. Can you get me a drink, I'm a bit thirsty?', he nodded and he stood up and he went to the drinks table he got me a drink.

When I stood up, I heard a familiar voice behind me and it was Syaoran 'Hello beautiful', he made sure no-one was watching and he squeezed my hand gently, trying to tell me that he missed me.

'Syaoran I don't think you should stay this close to me, your fiancée could be watching'.

'She's in the ladies bathroom', I turned around and he kissed me by the cheeks and I said 'Syaoran I mean it, please don't, not here'. I saw Kohana walking towards Syaoran and I said 'She's coming over this way'.

Syaoran let me go and he stood next to me, and smiled at Kohana and they had a quick kiss in front of me 'You're back', Syaoran said, and I also saw Tomo coming back and he wondered who the guy was.

Kohana smiled realizing that we knew each other, me and Syaoran, so she asked me 'Sakura, do you two know each other?'

Syaoran answered that question 'We used to be best friends during high school', and I saw the look of jealousy in Kohana's eyes.

Tomo stood next to me and gave me the drink and I said to Kohana and Syaoran 'Guys I want you to meet Tomo, he's a new friend I made tonight and he's amazing'. Syaoran looked at me, because I was standing so close to him, and he was jealous, 'I'm just going to have a dance with Tomo, I'll leave you two alone'.

Syaoran looked at me as I was walking away and Kohana followed his eyes 'You two used to be best friends and you never told me?', Kohana asked, demanding a straight and honest answer from him.

'We didn't have time to know each other as well as we should have, we both know that'.

She asked him straight off 'Do you love her?'

'What the hell are you talking about?'

'Because I don't want to marry you if you love her', she told him, right now she was really frustrated by the fact that she didn't know about the past they had.

'What if I told you … what would you do', he asked, and Kohana's face turned into something really bad.

'I can't believe you!', pushing Syaoran hard on the chest and she started crying. Luckily they weren't around a crowd and not much people heard what they were talking about. Then I walked past them, and Kohana went over to me and slapped me hard around the face, Tomo protected me and Syaoran held back Kohana. A fight was going to start between the two woman.

Review if you want me to continue on with the story.


	16. I still love you

Chapter 16

I asked 'Kohana what are you doing?', as she moved forwards, nearly punching me, but she stopped.

'You're a fucking bitch Sakura, pretending nothing was going on between my fiancée and you, I will tell you this. I will try and make your life hell Sakura, I don't care what happens and I will marry Syaoran', she said in such a powerful voice that I actually started believing her. I was now scared of what may happen next.

Tomo stepped forward and said 'Syaoran I think you better leave', Syaoran nodded at his suggestion and took Kohana's arm and they started walking away, then I felt a hug from Tomo and he asked me 'You allright?'

'I'm fine …'

'You were in some pretty business there, you want to tell me what happened?'

'It's a long story', I said, but the look in his eyes made me want to tell him more about the story 'We were best friends, me and Syaoran and I don't want to talk about it anymore'.

'Let's hope no-one else saw that, it would be some BIG news if the paparazzi saw it'.

'I know, I think I might just go home now', as I was about to walk away, Tomo took my arm and his intoxicating eyes looked at me.

'If you stay a bit longer tonight you might forget about it … come on', as he was leading me back to where the party was.

I thought to myself _"Maybe he's right … but I'm so tired now. Oh well I don't have work tomorrow". _So I said 'Okay, but I have to control myself I don't want to have a big headache tomorrow drinking champagne'.

He smiled wickedly at him, and I enjoyed the night. We were dancing all night and it was a good opportunity for me to get to know the IMPORTANT people in the fashion industry.

The next morning, I couldn't open my eyes properly, my eyes were burning. My whole body was so sore. I looked around the room and I was glad that it was MY room, but something was beside me and I turned to look and it was Tomo, naked and he was still sleeping. I though to myself _"OH MY GOD I SLEPT WITH TOMO!', _I sat up quickly shocked at what just happened. I quickly got changed and I went downstairs and I made myself coffee, I couldn't believe that I just slept with a boy. He wasn't even 18 yet. My daughter was still sleeping and I was glad for that. I didn't want her to see some random guy kissing me.

Someone came up behind me and it was Tomo and he hugged me from behind 'You left bed … why?'

I turned around and looked into Tomo's eyes, 'We can't do this, I'm old any our young … I'm 5 years older than you'.

'I don't care, ever since I saw you yesterday. I feel in love with you … do you feel the same way?'

'I don't know … my husband just died Tomo', I said trying to find any excuse not to approve of the relationship that would be building right now 'I don't think I should be with anyone right now'.

'What do you mean?'

'We can't be together …', I saw a little figure come up behind Tomo.

Machiko said 'Mummy whats', I took Machiko in my arms.

'Tomo, can you please leave … I'll talk to you later, at work. Meet me at my office', I smiled, trying to be nice. I didn't want to be cold to him, because he was a great guy.

'Okay … I'll come by your office later on', luckily he was changed and on his way out, he saw Nolee.

Kohana was in Darien's office and she wanted to fire me, but right now Darien didn't want me to be fired. I was a great worker and I had potentials. Darien said 'I'm not going to fire Sakura, she's a great worker. The best advice I can give you Kohana is try and solve this problem. You know it wasn't her fault'.

'So I hate that girl … I don't want her designing my dress …'

'Then I suggest you go somewhere else', Kohana didn't like that idea, then I walked in the office and Kohana gave me a rude look.

I said 'Am I catching you two at a bad time?'

'Sit down Sakura … I think Kohana has something to tell you', Darien said and I sat down away from Kohana. Right now I didn't want anything to do with her. I had my own problems to deal with and also Tomo.

'Ms. Kinomoto, I changed my mind about you designing my dress. Since no-one in this stupid company is willing to do my dress I'm going to Vera Wang's company and ask them instead'.

'It wasn't my fault you know', I said to Kohana looking at her, showing power and truth in my eyes 'He loved me and he still does not you and you know why you will never get him to love you because you are just not good enough'.

Kohana was now getting angry and said 'You better take that back or else'.

'You can't do anything', then Kohana stood up and slapped me hard right across my cheeks and she walked out. But I was not going to give up like that, and people always said I was competitive and I was not going to let anyone think I wasn't. I stood up and slapped her back and I pulled her hair. She turned around and kicked me and a rough cat fight started in the office and Darien called security and asked the other employees to help stop this.

'You fucking whore', Kohana yelled at me.

'He doesn't want you!' I yelled back at her. The security guards came and separated the two girls.

'I'm fucking leaving', Kohana said, it wasn't the proper way to talk since she was going to be the future Queen. I went straight to the toilet and washed my face. My lip was now bleeding and Darien came in the girls' bathroom (but no-one else was in there) it was bag of ice and he put it on my face.

'Are you allright?', he sounded so worried, I smiled weakly at him.

'Its hurts a bit but it'll heal', I sat down on the floor, and I started crying. I really didn't want this kind of life. I just wanted to have a normal life, settle down and take care of Machiko but it was a lot more complicated than that.

'You can take the day off if you want …', I shook my head 'Okay if you want to, then I guess you want to know that someone is in your office right now. That guy we saw last night', I totally forgot he was coming and I couldn't look like this, then Darien said 'You look fine, he's been waiting for a while now', I stood up and fixed my hair and I walked to my office.

I opened the door and he stood up and kissed me by the cheeks 'What happened to your face?', he asked me.

'Its nothing … I was just you know, well I got in a fight with some bitch'.

'Let me guess, Kohana?', he smirked at me, I looked up at him and he was so cute. He reminded me so much of Ryu and, I frowned, but I didn't notice it until he asked me 'Why are you frowning?'

'Nothing I was just thinking about something …'

'So about the thing, I wanted to talk about it'.

'What?', I wasn't really paying attention.

'About us, remember you wanted me to come here because you wanted to talk about it'.

'Oh yeah, all I have to say is it will be weird'.

'What do you mean … You like me right?'

'Yeah but …'

'There's someone else isn't there?'

'No … I told you earlier, its just too soon'.

'Okay I wont' force you but I want you to know that I like you a lot', I looked up at him and he looked so cute. He reminded me so much of Ryu that its started hurting me.

'Okay …', he sat down in front of me and he said 'Want me to fix your face you looked pretty bad?'

'Yeah allright. I'll get the first aid kit', I stood up and got it from the storage room. I came back and he was smiling at me. There was something about Tomo that was just irresistible and I couldn't figure it out. I sat by my sofa and he sat in front of me facing me.

'Tell me if I do anything that hurts', he took out the alcohol and slowly and gently started putting in on the cuts on my face 'You've got beautiful eyes you know that …'

I smiled, I knew he was trying to charm me and it was working 'So how's the acting career?'

'I kind of took a break … I want to concentrate on my exams'.

'That's good. You know I've never graduated'.

'I head, because you were pregnant right?'

'Yeah I kind of regretted it because I wanted to graduate and don't tell me I could repeat because I'd look like a big fool', he laughed at me and started putting this clear band-aids on my face and his fingers were so soft, and as I was so close to him, I could smell his intoxicating aftershave.

He smiled at me then that moment we just looked at each other and I kissed him, and for a second there he didn't kiss me back but he eventually did, he slowly parted my lips with his tongue and I started moaning in the kiss. For a teenager he was a pretty good kisser. I pulled away and I smiled at him 'You're a good kisser you know'.

'Really?', I nodded at him and he pulled me in a kiss once again. We were making out by my office and we didn't even see Nolee come in with Machiko in her arms.

Nolee coughed, making me and Tomo pull apart and she said 'I'm just dropping off Machiko you were suppose to go to the zoo together, remember?'

I stood up and hugged my daughter, she was 4 years old now and I said 'I totally forgot … what time is it?'

Tomo said 'Its 12.30 there's still time'.

I said to Tomo 'Why don't you come with us … my daughter will like someone to come with us'.

Tomo smiled at the young baby girl and said 'Okay'.

Nolee said 'I can't go with you because I have to visit my dad in the hospital, is that allright?'

'Yeah sure', I took the bag with all of Machiko's stuff and I started walking with Tomo and Machiko to the elevator. Today was going to be a great day.

While we were at the zoo, I noticed the small looks Tomo would give me now and then and he was so cute. He bought my daughter this amazing elephant stuff toy and she loved it. I haven't seen my daughter so happy ever since Ryu died. I was starting to think maybe Machiko thought it was Ryu because Tomo looked liked him?

Problems with Kohana and Syaoran were starting to multiply. Apparently the paparazzi got a shot of what happened and its going to be all over the news this weekend. Syaoran was always fighting with her. They realized that they didn't want to be together anymore but there was nothing they could do about it.

Tonight was the BIG engagement Party for Kohana Williams and Syaoran Li. Kohana made sure that I wasn't coming because she was still angry about that fight they had over 2 days ago. Luckily she hired this expert make-up artist and her face was now flawless. That night Syaoran tried to behave but it was hard because he hardly knew anyone there because they were mostly 'WILLIAMS' which was pretty annoying. He really missed me and he couldn't stop thinking about me. But if he wanted me to be safe it would be better if he stayed away from me.

Syaoran was drinking wine by the gazebo and he looked at the stars _"I wish things were a lot different'._ Kohana came up behind me and said 'People are looking for you, you know'.

'I just want time for myself right now'.

'Are you still angry at me?', she hugged him tightly and she said 'I'm really sorry and I'm willing to make it up to you'.

He pulled away from that hug and he said 'Having her at the wedding will make me happy'.

'Why? Don't you love me enough to get over her?', tears started forming in her eyes.

'She is my best friend … how do you think you would feel if you didn't invite your best friend'.

'But she's different, you two have a history together – its not the same … I wish'.

'Honestly Kohana would you marry me even though we haven't met each other and if I wasn't a prince?', she didn't give him and answer and he said 'That's exactly what I thought', then his mobile started ringing and it was an unknown number and he answered it 'Hello?'

'Mr. Li this is the St. Patrick hospital your grandparents just got into a serious car accident and they are dead, we tried saving them but it was too late, their injuries were too serious'.

'Oh my god, does anybody else know?'

'No, but I'd like you and your family to come over here at once'.

'Okay', after he hanged up that phone call, Nyoko, Kin, Kohana and Syaoran went straight to the hospital. It was a big shock when his mother found out, because she actually collapsed, but something in Syaoran was happy. Since Sachi was dead, he wouldn't have to marry Kohana anymore. But once again, who knows what will happen in the future.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

I woke up to be in the arms of Tomo. We've been together for over 2 weeks now and everything has been amazing. For the last couple of weeks, we've spent each night together, making love by the fireplace, when it's dark. I understand Tomo was still at school so at day, I left him time to do his school work. I've heard about what happened to Syaoran's grandparents and I expressed my sympathy to them when I visited Mr. and Mrs. Li and gave them support. I couldn't bare see Syaoran now when I've got a stable relationship with Tomo now. Its been 2 weeks since I last saw of any Li.

I opened my eyes and let the sun in, and I felt Tomo's strong arms around me. He asked me 'You awake?'

'Uh – huh', I could feel his sweet kisses in my neck.

'Don't you have to start going … you have school today?'

He groaned and he said 'I don't want to go today, I feel really tired'.

I laughed and said 'Did I work you too hard last night?'

He laughed at what I said 'You wish … its just I've got swords training later on and I have soccer practice at school'.

'So does that mean you can't make it tonight for the party?'

'Oh no … oh I totally forgot', he was kidding around. He did that around me and I hated it sometimes because it was believable.

'You can meet my hot friends', I said teasing him, he had seen some of my friend and he thought they were hot, but they were nothing compared to me 'You don't have to bring anything, just be here allright?'

'I'll try', he smirked.

'What do you mean you'll try, you better be here or else I'll be disappointed', I frowned at him, but all he did was kiss me by my cheeks.

'I have to go … I'll see you tonight I promise', he said, he kissed me one last time and he drove to his house so that he could get changed.

When I went downstairs, Nolee was already feeding Machiko pancakes and they were so happy. I'm glad they liked Tomo, and especially Machiko, she loved it when Tomo went over because they always played around. I asked 'Nolee can you go shopping today, I've got friends over and I'd love it if you cook tonight … my friends love your cooking', I sat down beside my daughter drinking tea.

'Sure … anything specific?' Nolee asked me.

'Lamb roast or something as long as it doesn't involve seafood. I'm just going to go upstairs I'm running a bit late', I kissed me daughter in the cheeks before I went upstairs to take a long bathe.

I walked into my office and there was a newspaper opened up and I looked at it with headlines.

**NO MORE WEDDINGS FOR THE PRINCE.**

Syaoran called off the wedding, and I knew he would eventually do that. Ramos knocked on my door and he asked 'Did you read the news?'

'Yeah I just saw it just then', Ramos and I had a great working relationship now. Everyone in the company grew to love me and I was the heart of the company now.

'Do you like the fact that it happened?'

'I don't care anymore … I'm with Tomo now and I love him'.

'Did you tell him that?'

'Not yet, but I want him to say it first … don't guys usually say it first anyway?' I waited for him to answer my question.

'I don't know … I said it first to my girlfriend (his girlfriend is Jessica Killde) and she didn't say it back to me till a few days later. I guess it made her think about the relationship we had'.

'I love you sometimes', I said to Ramos. I loved him as a friend nothing more. He grew to be my best friend now.

'Well darling, I've got to go back to work, by the way Darien wanted to see you …' he left my office and I just sat there thinking about what just happened. Even though I keep thinking that I was over Syaoran, he was still in my mind.

Back in Japan.

Syaoran was rowing, he was so angry at everyone in the palace right now, forcing him to make decisions. He took out all of his anger in rowing. Then he took a break, he looked at the lake around him and it was a great view. He was wondering what to do right now because he had a decision to make about leaving his throne to be with Sakura or live a life without her.

He also had his painting kit there with him. Everytime he went rowing, he just brang his kit in case he wants to paint and right now it was the perfect time. It was now autumn and the leaves were just starting to fall and he looked at the Cherry Blossom Tree in front of him and painted it with so much passion. It looked amazing, then after that he rowed back to the lake nearby the palace and he looked at the life he would have to live if he did this. Chaos …

**Sakura's friends**

_They were all hot, rich people._

**Yuki & Takara** was still together, and now they are engaged and to be married.

**Natsuko Kita**, is a childhood friend and she was the girl who didn't like being in relationships.

**Haruko Toyo**, is in the music industry and she gets to work with the hottest music stars of the time. She is currently going out, with this guy named Goro.

**Daisuke**, is a painter. Lately he's been concentrating on his work that's why Sakura hasn't heard from him for a long while. Daisuke was also Ryu's best friend.

**Misaki**, is a ballet teacher and she's been dancing for while. During high school, she won lots of awards during her senior years and now, she's just settling down with her boyfriend Nobu. She still had a crush on Daisuke ever since they first met and that was ages ago.

**Yuudai**, likes Sakura. But after he heard about all the bad situations he tried forgetting about her and now he was with Umeko, a model. Yuudai used to work for the NW magazine as a professional photographer but he quit last year. Now he was working in architect industry.

I got home and I found Nolee cooking the Lamb Roast already and I smiled, I went into the kitchen and said 'I'm so happy you were able to cook … I really want to thank you Nolee', I put the bags down, since I bought wines.

'Its allright … I didn't have any plans anyway'.

'Have any of my friends called?' I asked as I put the wines in the fridge and I saw the house cleaned up and decorated.

She started chopping up vegetables and said 'Your friend Yuudai called he said he was going to be late for a couple of hours. Apparently his girlfriend had a fashion show to do but he made sure he would come'.

'Okay … what about Tomo?' I turned and looked at her.

'He didn't call …' I was shocked that he didn't call because he usually called 'Don't worry Sakura he'll be here'.

I tried smiling, but instead I excused myself upstairs 'I'm just going to get changed and take a shower, I promise I won't be long'.

'Okay …' I slowly walked upstairs and checked on my daughter and luckily she was already sleeping.

**10 minutes till the party started**

Everything was prepared in case any of my friends came early. I've been calling Tomo's phone and he wasn't answering. I started getting worried, thinking that he couldn't make it. It would really disappoint me if he didn't come because he promised me …

The doorbell rang and I excitedly answered the door, but before that I straightened up my white vintage dress and I opened it, I saw Daisuke and he was holding a box that looked like it contained food 'Daisuke … your early as usual', I hugged him tightly missing him so much and he looked good so I told him 'Your looking good', I welcomed him in my house.

'I haven't heard from you for a long while … I've missed you Sakura', I put the food down but I realized that it was cheesecake ( And I loved cheesecake!). I sat beside him and he asked me 'So how are you really?'

'Fine I guess … everything's going well', I smiled warmly at him.

'So where's your boyfriend … isn't he the reason we are all here?', he wondered where he was and I didn't know how to answer him, and luckily the doorbell rang.

I stood up and answered it and it was Tomo and I was glad that he came, he kissed me passionately not realizing that one of my friends were already there. I pulled away and said 'Tomo my friend is here', he laughed and I said 'Come on in, I'll introduce you to him'.

Daisuke stood up and he smiled at Tomo 'It's good to finally meet you – u', suddenly the doorbell rang and it was Syaoran I stepped back in shock.

'What are you doing here Syaoran?', I wanted him out already.

He pulled me to a kiss and I tried to resist him but his kisses always melted me 'Sakura … I will do anything for you. We need to be together. I know you have feelings for Tomo but we both know the feelings we have for each other is way stronger … I love you'.

Tomo came up behind me wondering who was at the door, he asked me 'Is everything allri- oh', he saw Syaoran and he stopped talking. This night would turn out to one of those stupid nights. Tomo was always overprotective of me and he hated Syaoran. 'What are you doing here Li? Didn't I tell you to stay away from her?'

'She's not just yours … its not like you two were married?', Tomo started getting angry, then Syaoran continued 'Do you know that we share a daughter together?', that sent Tomo over the edge and he punched Syaoran hard. But Syaoran wasn't the type to give up and now they were fighting. It was a disadvantage for Syaoran because Tomo was a very skilled fighter (and swordsman too) and now they were fighting like there was no tomorrow.

I yelled to the two men 'Stop right now please!', but they still continued on fighting and I knew I couldn't stop this so I faked collapsed and the two men ran over to my side. They realized I was faking it when they got to me …

I said to Tomo 'I think you should leave for tonight … I'm canceling the party. I just want to talk to Syaoran alone to settle things', Tomo was disappointed that I chose to stay with Syaoran instead of him, but he left.

So I cancelled the party and none of my friends were coming. Now I was in my penthouse that I bought in the City. I would stay in my penthouse everytime I couldn't make it home. It was a place just for me and it was pretty huge. I just got the penthouse over 2 weeks ago. I was in the living room with Syaoran and he looked at me … we both didn't know what to say and we couldn't just say anything, IT WASN'T THAT EASY.

I looked into his eyes and he smiled at me 'I don't know where to start …'

'You were all I was thinking about ever since I left for Japan. I need you in my life and I know there's a part of you that wants me in your life. Sakura I promise you and I really mean it this time when you decide to forgive me and give our relationship another chance. I promise not to disappoint you, I promise to love you, I promise to never ever leave you again …'

I heard all he was saying but he broke other promises before and I wasn't sure that I was just going to trust him, but when I looked into his eyes, there was trust in those brown eyes, and I realized deep inside me I was STILL in LOVE with SYAORAN. I've loved him, but I couldn't just live like this and pretend no more. He stood in front on me and he went on his knees and started kissing me passionately. At first I didn't respond but his kisses always made me melt. I didn't need to say anything to him to make him understand what I felt for him. We had this special relationship of knowing each other's want and right now we wanted each other so bad …

After we made love so many times, that I couldn't remember how many times, we looked into each others' eyes. It was around 1 am and we were so tired, but Syaoran wanted this moment to last, instead, he told me stories that slowly made me fall asleep. All I could remember from that night was that he was purely amazing and romantic. I could live a life like this forever with him … and that night I chose to. If I chose Syaoran that would be meaning that I would have to break Tomo's heart, and it would distract him because his final exams were coming up so soon. So I decided to wait …

The next morning after a lovely evening. I woke up to be in Syaoran and I was in his arms. I realized that he was already awake and I smiled up at him and asked him 'How long have you been awake?'

'Long enough … I just loved seeing you asleep, it's the greatest sight ever', he smiled and he kissed me softly and we swapped positions and now I was on the bottom and he was on the top 'Last night was amazing … god I missed you so much', then he gave me another kiss. A kiss which he never gave me and I loved it. We stayed in that kiss till my home phone started ringing. He pulled away from me and gave me space to answer the phone.

'Hello', I said when I picked up the cordless phone. It was Nolee.

'Sakura! Machiko had an asthma attack and she isn't doing so well, she's in ER', sounding so worried about the little kid.

I looked at Syaoran as I was starting to get changed, he was wondering what was up because I started panicking, he asked me 'Is everything allright?', whilst I was still on the phone.

I hanged up the phone call and I said 'Machiko is in ER, she had an asthma attack', he was in shock and he started getting changed and I asked him 'Are you coming with me?'

'Yeah of course, she's my daughter too you know', I smiled, I haven't seen this side of him before. We quickly rushed to the hospital where Nolee told me my daughter was and I rushed in and saw Nolee by the waiting area.

'I found her this morning and she wasn't breathing … she was feeling well last night', Nolee told me and I looked at the emergency room.

'How long has she been in there?', I sat down next to her and Syaoran smiled at Nolee.

'About 30 minutes now, the doctors haven't been coming out so I guess its pretty serious. I'm so sorry Sakura, I wished I was there for her', she surprisingly hugged me tightly.

'Its allright Nolee, it wasn't your fault', I hugged her back, we have grown to be close to each other ever since she started caring for Machiko.

2 hours later.

Dr. Reynolds, who was there to help deliver Machiko and had been Machiko's regular doctor came out and he looked exhausted. Nolee had fallen asleep and Syaoran had to go somewhere, and I stood up as Dr. Reynolds walked over to me, 'Is she allright?', I asked him.

'She's fine, though she just suffered a very serious asthma attack. Someone should always be with her and with her medication. If this happened again, it might even be more serious. She's currently asleep now and its best for her to just rest now', I sadly smiled at him and he said 'She'll be fine Sakura', he reassured me.

'Thank you so much', I smiled at him once again. I went to my daughter's hospital room and Machiko was so serene sleeping on the bed. I regretted leaving with Syaoran that night, because I put Syaoran over my daughter's safety. From now on I would put my daughter first.

**The next day.**

I woke up to be alone in the room and Machiko was awake and I went to her side and asked 'How are you feeling?'

She whispered to me 'Mummy I'm hungry', I smiled at her.

'Okay I'll go downstairs and get you food that you like, just stay here allright. Don't go anywhere', I kissed her in the forehead and I walked downstairs. I got her a bowl of fruit salad, apple juice and a sandwich. I brought the tray back to the room and when I went back to the room, Tomo was there and he smiled at me and I wondered how he knew that Machiko was here.

'What are you doing here?', I asked Tomo. I was scared for a moment because it seemed like he was stalking me.

'I heard about what happened and I just wanted to visit her', playing with Machiko 'Did you not want me here?', he looked at me.

'I need to talk to you outside', I said, then I walked over to Machiko with the tray and said to her 'Just eat, I'll be just outside to talk to Tomo allright?'

'Okay mummy', she smiled. I took Tomo's hand and we argued outside.

'What the hell are you doing here? Didn't I tell you that we need time apart?', I asked him. This was a frustrating time. 'Tomo I don't think it's a good idea for us two to be together'.

'Does this mean you want to break up?', he looked at me straight in the eye but I tried avoiding it.

'Yeah, you were great, but we're just too different, you're a kid and we can't. You should be concentrating on your exams now, not me and my problems'.

'But I want to be with you. If you want a break then I'll give you the time. I just odn't want our relationship to end, you mean too much to me …', he wanted to make this relationship work but I was with Syaoran now.

'We can't. Tomo, I'm with Syaoran now. Its better this way', for a moment there I saw his eyes getting watery but he just stepped back, knowing something happened last night.

'You slept with him last night didn't you?', he was starting to get angry by the fact that I "cheated" on him last night 'You loved him more than me. You loved him but you still …'

'I'm sorry Tomo, I hope we can be friends in the future'.

'There's no way I want to be friends with someone like you. I trusted you Sakura but all you did was betray the trust we shared', he was so shocked this was happening 'Even though you love Syaoran now, I know that you still love me. I'm not going to hate you Sakura because I love you too much. I just want you to know, that I'll always be here for you, when you are not with Syaoran anymore. I promise you that. Even though it may take 10 or 20 years I'll still be here no matter what', he bent his head and kissed me softly in the forehead. Though I though he was going to kiss me in the lips. Luckily he didn't because I saw Syaoran walking out of the elevator and he was holding a bag. 'I guess I should start going before me and Syaoran start fighting', he smiled at me one last time and he started walking the opposite way.

A minute later, Syaoran kissed me in the neck and said 'Hey sexy', I turned around he kissed me in the lips 'I missed you'.

'I missed you too', I hugged him.

'How's Machiko? Doing better?', he looked at the room and she was eating her food 'I guess she is because she's eating again'.

'If your going to ask me about Tomo, its over between us two', he smiled at me and said 'I'm glad he didn't react negatively'.

'I wouldn't have hesistated to fight him'.

'Exactly and I don't want my daughter seeing violence', he laughed and he kissed me one last time before we entered in and I asked 'How's the food Machiko, baby?'.

'Its yummy mum ... who's that boy?', looking at Syaoran. Machiko had seem him around I just haven't introduced him to her.

'This is your father, Machiko, his name is Syaoran. You can call him dad if you want'.

'Why haven't I seen him around mummy?'

'Because …', I needed to find an excuse, and luckily Syaoran save me there.

Syaoran said to the little girl 'I had to travel around the world', smiling warmly at Machiko.

'Mummy when am I getting out of here?', my daughter asked as I knew she wanted to get back home because she missed her pets.

'Soon baby, you just have to be here in case anything happens. Just a day more', I said to her, she was such an energetic girl. Syaoran sat beside me and he took out something out of the paper bag.

'I got you something Machiko', Syaoran said to her, 'I hope you like it', he took out a new CareBear stuff toy and it was scented.

'I love it', hugging the toy. I smiled at the sight of Syaoran and Machiko smiling and playing together. This was what I wanted, a real family. Somehow when I thought of that, it reminded me of Ryu, and if he was alive now, Ryu would be a great father for Machiko. Then I remembered I haven't visited him for a long while and I ought to do it. I needed to tell him that my life was now settling down and how I missed him.


	18. What will happen next?

**Chapter 18**

Syaoran and I were finally together, and I was so glad this was happening after so many years and months we couldn't be together. It had been a month ever since Machiko scared me with her asthma attack and luckily she had been fine. Today was my birthday but I told everyone that I didn't want a party and I was currently still in bed and Syaoran was nowhere to be seen. I knew he had a surprise for me and I had one for him too.

I went downstairs and Syaoran was cooking breakfast. He had always been a great cook, I remembered the time he cooked me dinner one night when my dad was hospitalized and no-one else was home. I surprised him by kissing him by the neck and he jumped as I did that 'Why didn't you tell me you were awake?', he asked me.

'You didn't tell me YOU were awake. What are you cooking?', I sat down by the counter. We were currently at my penthouse because we had a late night last night in the city. I was wearing this tiny night-gown from last night and I knew he was being seduced by it.

'Pancakes with strawberries', he smiled at me and he said to me while his back was facing me 'You know we have to go somewhere this morning, so stop seducing me Sakura', I smirked at him and I forgot where we were suppose to go.

'Where are we going again?', I asked him. The pancakes were cooked, he sat next to me and he kissed me soundly.

'We're going to … well it's a surprise', he smiled and I tickled him, trying to get an answer out of him. He started laughing and he said 'Stop it, you know I'm ticklish', he looked so cute as he said that and I stopped.

'Tell me', I took some of the pancakes he cooked and it was delicious.

'You'll love where we're going', that was all he said to me, and we finished breakfast and we took a steamy shower together. God I loved Syaoran so much and life was finally going my way.

Before we went to the car to go somewhere, he put a blindfold over my eyes and he carefully led me to his car. I knew we were going somewhere big because I have never seen him so excited. I was so eager where he was taking me and then I felt the car stopped and I asked him 'Can I take off the blindfold yet?'

'No not yet … I want it to be a surprise', he carefully led me out of the car and we walked down a stair, and I could hear the sound of waves coming from the beach and finally we stopped, he slowly took off my blindfold and said 'Okay'.

I opened my eyes and we were under this big tree, and in front of me was a house. A house I've always wanted ever since I was a teenager but it was just a foolish kid dream, 'What do you mean by this?'

'I know you've always wanted this house and I just heard a couple of weeks ago that the owner left because they couldn't pay the rent anymore and I've decided to but it for you', I was purely shocked.

'I can't take this Syaoran that would be asking too much … and', he looked at me oddly as if I wasn't appreciating what he was doing but I was. Its just this was just asking too much out of him.

'You don't want it?', I smiled at him.

'I do want it but', he took my hand and led me inside. The place was amazing and it had an ancient look to it. There was a table in the master room verandah and there was food on top of it 'What's going on?' I wondered what the heck was happening.

Suddenly his mobile phone rang and he left the room to answer it and I was alone in the verandah waiting …

5 minutes later he came back and he sat in front of me 'Sorry', he said.

'It's allright … Syaoran – I', I stopped as I saw him smiling, I had something to tell him and right now I didn't want to ruin the good mood he had.

'We should start eating before it starts getting disgusting. I know how you hate your food cold', I smiled at him. He knew me like the back of his hand and I was glad for that. We ate our lunch and it was delicious, he made sure he liked it because he specially ordered it. I looked at Syaoran and I knew something else was coming up. After we ate we just talked and we toured the rest of the house. But when it came to the guest bedroom we started making out so bad and he gently pushed me to the wall and he said 'I want you so bad right now', I smiled at him.

'We shouldn't not here … Syaoran we can't', I pushed him away gently. I needed to tell him something, so I sat down in the bed and patted the seat to Syaoran and said 'I need to tell you something and its been bothering me'.

He sat beside me and hugged me tightly and asked 'Is everything allright?'

'No, actually no. Well it depends on how you take the news and I hope you'll be happy', I sighed looking into his auburn eyes; I hope he would like the news. 'I'm pregnant Syaoran, 2 weeks pregnant', I told him just like that and now I was waiting for him to react.

'What?', he asked me. He was confused and shocked by all this, but it was expected because we never used protection and I stopped taking the pills.

I started crying, by the way he said what, it didn't sound so good, and I sat up and cried by the window 'Now I know you don't want this …', suddenly I felt his hug behind me and I wiped my tears away 'Its okay … I understand, but I'm keeping this baby, if that means you don't want to be with me'.

'What do you mean … I love you Sakura and I would never ever leave you again. I promised you that. And having a new baby is amazing', he teased me kissing me in the neck 'Its great having a new addition to our family'; I turned around and hugged him tightly.

The next morning I found myself naked in my bed (real house, not penthouse), and I looked around for him and wondered where he was. He always left bed early and it was annoying sometimes because I don't get my good morning kiss. Then I remembered that he had an appointment and I sighed. I keep forgetting things like this. I went downstairs and I kissed my baby in the cheeks and said 'Good morning baby'.

'Hi mummy', she smiled at me.

'You going to tour the school today right?', she nodded at me and I asked Nolee 'Your coming with her?'

'Yeah, you have work today, Darien wants to see you first thing when you get to work', I nodded and drank down a glass of juice. I sat next to Machiko as I started eating some of the muffins in the table. 'I feel lousy today, I don't think I want to go to work'.

Nolee said to me 'Well, Darien said something about a fashion show, maybe you should go – wait a minute, I think your sister called too, late last night and she has an engagement party coming up and you have to go'.

'Okay … you think you can find a dress for me?', I asked Nolee. Even though she was a care taker for Machiko, she was always there for me, help me with my BUSY life.

'When is it?', I chewed down the muffin, and it was delicious.

'Tomorrow night, its pretty soon but she's been trying to contact you for the last couple of days'.

'Okay … I'll go to work', I went upstairs and took a quick shower then I got changed then I got to work.

When I go to work, there was always a copy of COSMOPOLITAN magazine on my table and I always read through it every morning. I dropped my things then I took the lift to Darien's floor since he wanted to see me. I knocked at his door and I also flipped the page, then suddenly it was a black page, then I flipped the page again, then it was back to normal.

'Come in', Darien said to me. I went in his office and sat down. I listened to him at the same time reading the magazine. Suddenly I came across a pink page and it looked like an ad, I read it and it said **Sakura Kinomoto, will you do the honors of marrying me, Syaoran Li**, and I was shocked as I read that. The whole country would have seen this and I smiled.

'What's up Sakura?', he asked me.

'Syaoran just proposed to me'.

'What are you saying?', I smiled.

'I say yes … oh my god, he must have spent thousands to get the page printed', I laughed and I loved the idea that he totally surprised me and it was so romantic.

'Good, because he predicted you will say yes, I have the ring. He couldn't be here right now but he wanted everything to go perfect', he took out a black box and it revealed a white gold ring along with so many diamonds. I have never seen so many diamonds in one ring.

'Oh my god, that's beautiful', I gasped as I took the box from Darien.

He smiled at me and he was so happy for me 'You should put it on', he smiled at me.

I took the ring from the box and I put it on, and it fitting perfectly, I couldn't believe this.

Syaoran called me during my lunch break and he missed me 'Did you get the message?'

'Oh my god yes, why couldn't you ask me yourself, you know?', I asked him. It was better to ask questions in person.

'Well would you like me to?', he asked me.

'Yes sir, I do', I said to him in an Texan accent, 'You don't have to, I was just kidding around, but my answer is yes. I'd love to marry you'.

'Sakura, I just want to call you to check up on you, I can't make it for dinner tonight I'm sorry. I'm in this World Conference in Canberra and I can't get out of it'.

'Is it boring?', I asked him, I couldn't handle a day of old people talking about the problems of their countries.

'Yeah, god yes, so I guess I'll see you first thing tomorrow', I knew that he was trying to make this call as fast as he could but I didn't want to stop talking to yet.

'My sisters engagement Party is on tomorrow, you can make it right?'

'Yeah sure … look baby I have to go, I'll see you tomorrow. I love you'.

'I love you too, bye', I hanged up my phone and I thought to myself, something was really going on in that Conference, I've never heard him so tense, ever since he told me he was going back to Japan and stuff like that.

For the rest of the afternoon I went shopping with Nolee for the dress tomorrow and I would have to buy a suit for Syaoran too. I left Machiko with Daisuke since he was still in town. He decided to buy a house around town and that was all because he met a girl named Emi Sujoui, daughter of a Japanese multi-billionaire, but she wanted a normal life and her dad allowed that, since she was the only child. They were crazy in love and Daisuke had never fallen in LOVE, like truly and this was the first for him. Daisuke was always the player, but now, he promised himself to Emi and only Emi.

Nolee was great to shop with because she had a great taste in clothes and I always shopped with her. I sometimes bought Nolee designer clothes to thank her for being a caretaker for my daughter. I promised myself that I would give some of my money to her if I die. While we were shopping I saw Umeko, Yuudai's girlfriend, and I said hi to her, I walked over to her and said 'Umeko, hi', she turned around and smiled at me.

'Hi Sakura, its been a while', I nodded at her, but I was wondering where Yuudai was.

'Is Yuudai with you?'

'Oh no, I was just in town for the upcoming fashion show. He could have been here but he's busy with his building, you know he gets when he's concentrating', I laughed at what she said, I looked at her fingers and there was an engagement ring.

'Did you get engaged?', she smiled at me.

'Yeah I did, Yuudai proposed to me and it was so romantic, I can't believe he asked me, I really thought he wasn't but I guess he wants me in his life forever', she smiled at me and looked at my finger 'I read the proposal that Li got for you, it was so romantic, all I could do was smile when I read it'.

'I know, it shocked me too', I could tell that she had plans so I left her to go 'It was nice catching up to you, maybe I'll see you at the fashion show right?'

'Yeah sure', she smiled at me and she walked out of the shop.

Then Nolee came beside me and she said 'She's so tall and pretty', I nodded at her.

'I never thought that Yuudai would actually propose to her, I guess he's serious about her'.

'I found a dress and a suit for you and Syaoran, I think we should start going', we went to the counter and got the clothes for tomorrow's party and on the way home, I got a box of delicious chocolate mud cake for Machiko. It was her birthday soon and I would have to throw her the best children's party in the world.

Back in Canberra

Syaoran was so exhausted listening to the world leaders argue about their problems. He couldn't believe he had to spend a whole day listening to this. He was glad that Sakura said yes to his proposal and he would have done it personally but he couldn't after he had a call this morning that he had to fly straight to Canberra.

He sighed eating his dinner in his hotel room. It was now 10.30 and he had been in the same room with those old men since 7.00 this morning. He wanted to call Sakura but it was getting late so he just decided to take a shower then went to bed straight away. He would be flying back to Sydney at 4.00 tomorrow.

Back in Sydney

It was 6.00 and I woke up. Every morning I had a routine of jogging around the town every weekend, except when I was busy. I couldn't believe that I was still engage and I was so happy about it. I listened to my iPOD as I started running faster. After so many years, Syaoran had never given up on our relationship and I was glad that I was with someone like him. After my 1 hour jog, I came home and Syaoran was there and I jumped on him missing him so much.

'Oh my god I missed you so much …' he kissed me passionately not caring by the fact that I was sweating 'Sorry I'm sweating, I just went for a jog'.

'That doesn't matter', he kissed me one last time and Nolee walked in on us making out, kissing each other. She fakely coughed and I pulled away from him.

'Nolee, uh sorry about this', I smiled at Syaoran who looked like he too was embarrassed 'Syaoran's back', I said to Nolee.

Syaoran kissed her in the cheeks and said 'Hi Nolee'.

Nolee said 'Well I'm glad you two are bag together …', then she went to the kitchen and started cooking breakfast for everyone.

'We'll be upstairs', as I lead Syaoran to my room and the moment he locked my door closed, we started making out, missing each other's touch even though it had only been a day. But we've never been apart ever since we got back together. I didn't want to make love to him, well not yet since I was pregnant so we just took a bathe together, talking about what happened yesterday. I could tell by the way he looked at me, he was going to love me forever no matter what.

He kissed me passionately and said 'I love you so much', I smiled at him.

'I love you too', I said to him. He kissed me passionately once again before we got out of the bath tub and went downstairs. Being around Syaoran just made me so happy and whenever I wasn't with him. I just didn't feel whole.

When we went downstairs, I was smiling. I was in such a happy mood and I was planning on not going to work today, so that we could have a whole family time together. Machiko had a Pupil Free Day and now I was planning to bring her to a park or a beach and play around.

Syaoran asked me 'Do you have to go to work today?'

'Not really', I answered him 'We could spend a day together with Machiko, you haven't been spending enough time with her since your always busy', I looked at him, then he made this face that I couldn't figure out.

'I got Machiko something, I'll be back …', he went upstairs to my room and he got something. I helped Nolee cook breakfast since she looked tired today.

'What's up Nolee?', I asked her, getting worried. I've never seen her like this.

'I met a boy, and I was planning on going out with him today, the whole day, but I said no because who would be taking care of Machiko'.

'Nolee you're allowed to go anywhere just tell me so that I can make arrangements, why don't you call him and tell him that you changed your mind?' I smiled at her, she deserved to be happy.

'Okay … thank you so much Sakura', walking towards the phone.

'Why don't you bring him for dinner sometime, I want to meet this boy', Nolee smiled and dialed his phone number.

UPSTAIRS

Syaoran knew something was going to happen in the future that only the world leaders knew, and he wanted to make Sakura his before that happened. Even though they were rushing, he just wanted to know that Sakura would be in his life. President Ericson (of USA) wanted him out of the country as soon as possible, but Syaoran knew he couldn't just do that, because he had to tell Sakura.

I knocked on the door wondering why he was taking so long to get that present and I asked 'Syao? You allright, you are taking so long to get that gift for Machiko'.

He smiled and quickly took it and hugged me tightly 'I want to marry you as soon as possible Sakura, what do you think?'

'Why the rush?', I looked at him, confused why the hell would he want to rush the important day of my life.

'I just want us married as soon as possible', he said to me, and he kissed me passionately but I moved away from him.

'Your hiding something from me', I said to him, I HATED it when people I trust hid something from me.

'I can't tell you Sakura, I really can't'.

'TELL ME SYAO', I yelled, demanding him to tell me.

'There's going to be a terrorist attack all over Australia', I stepped back in shock from what he said. A terrorist attack?

'What do you mean all over Australia?', I asked Syaoran.

'There's going to be one in Sydney, and they're planning on killing every life in this country, I MEAN EVERY LIFE'.

'Oh my god! Does anybody else know?'

'No, you're the only one that knows, that's why I want to get married to you in case anything happens. The baby has my name, so does Machiko and you', he hugged me tightly, he cared for me so much.

'I'll marry you …', I said nervously to him. As I said that, I was thinking of what may happen to my friends, my sister, my family, what would happen to them since they didn't know it was going to happen?

Review if you want me to continue.


	19. The end

Chapter 19

Syaoran was serious about all he said to me, and we got married as soon as possible that day. The day he got back from Canberra. I wore the gown that I bought yesterday and he wore the suit and we told Nolee and Machiko and we brought them with us for 'Witnesses'.

We got to the nearest chapel, by a valley in a quiet, peaceful town and the priest noticed that it was Prince Syaoran and he was not going to do it until there was a proper reason why they were getting married so fast. I asked Father Arthur to be alone in a room and it was quiet, I knew he wasn't going to be talking first and I said 'I love him you know, and we just want to be together. I was engaged before but we didn't end up getting married because he died, he was a firefighter. So please do this for me. I beg you father'.

But all he said to me 'Child, being in a marriage is big. You just don't - think about this'.

'I don't need to think about it, please', then he sighed deeply and he smiled 'Thank you father', I said to him and hugged him tightly. Finally we were getting married. Syaoran had been thinking about it all night and he already wrote his vows, his own vow and now we were getting married.

I got changed in the toilets and I looked at my white dress, it was beautiful. I looked at myself and for the first time, I was getting married and I was nervous. I touched my stomach and I was also expecting. My life was never perfect and this was just a part of it. Nolee knocked on the door and asked 'Is everything allright Sakura?'

'Yeah I'm fine', I said, looking at myself in the mirror. I walked out of the room, there was no music, and I started walking down the aisle and I smiled at Syaoran as I was walking towards him. He looked gorgeous as usual and I smiled, I was a happy bride that day. When it was part to say our vows, I was the one who said it first. I said **'I Sakura Kinomoto, take you Syaoran Li to be my husband, my partner in life and my one true love. I will cherish our union and love you more each day than I did the day before. I will trust you and respect you, laugh with you and cry with you, loving you faithfully through good times and bad, regardless of the obstacles we may face together. I give you my hand, my heart, and my love, from this day forward for as long as we both shall live'.**

Then, he turned to me and smiled at me before he started speaking and saying his vows to me **'I, Syaoran Li, take you, Sakura Kinomoto, to be my friend, my lover, the mother of my children and my wife. I will be yours in times of plenty and in times of want, in times of sickness and in times of health, in times of joy and in times of sorrow, in times of failure and in times of triumph. I promise to cherish and respect you, to care and protect you, to comfort and encourage you, and stay with you, for all eternity'.**

Then the priest finished off the wedding and we smiled at each other, and Father Arthur said 'You may now kiss the bride', and Syaoran kissed me passionately. I pulled away from him and looked at Machiko, she was watching and smiling as Nolee was holding her and Syaoran smiled and asked me 'Everything allright?'

'What's going to happen to my friends and my sister?', I was worried about what may happen to them.

'I'll get them a private jet, a big one and you have to contact all your friends and try and get them to the jet, that's the best I could do for you', I smiled and hugged him tightly. I was so scared 'You don't have to be scared, nothing is now going to happen to you'.

'I just love you so much', he hugged me so tightly.

'We're leaving in 2 days', he whispered to my ear.

The moment I got home, Nolee started packing everyone's bag, while I was trying to contact my sister and friends. I was so scared for them. I first called Aiko & Makoto because she came first and then Yuki & Takara, Haruko & Goro, Daisuke & Emi Sujoui, Misaki & Nobu, Yuudai & Umeko, Dennis, Darien, Ramos, and last of all Tomo.

Makoto answered the phone and he said 'Hello?'

'Makoto, its Sakura, I need to talk to my sister'.

'I can't let you … she's currently busy'.

'Its urgent Makoto just give her the phone', then I heard a deep sigh from him.

'I'll just go get her', then he dropped the phone and called Aiko from the garden.

A moment later she picked up the phone and asked 'What's up Sakura?'

'You have to the airport as soon as possible; I'll explain it to you later. Aiko you've got to trust me'.

'Why? You've got to tell me now', she said to me, but I couldn't tell her not yet. It would make her panic and I so didn't want that right now.'

'Please, we're meeting at Sydney Airport in 2 days, at 8am, I've already prepared everything'.

'Okay … I trust you but you better tell me'.

'Cancel your party tonight … you can't go on with it yet'.

'But everything is prepared, do you know how much money I've already spent on it?', she had been planning this for such a long time.

'I'll pay for everything the second round bills for the engagement party and everything Aiko so don't worry', I said to her, then she sighed deeply once again.

'Fine, okay, I'll see you in two days at the airport'.

Then after I called my sister I called each other of my friends. But when I called for Tomo's number, because I still considered him as my friend, he wasn't answering his phone. He usually didn't and I expected it. But I wanted him to answer the phone badly because I needed to get him out of the country.

My husband came up behind me and asked 'Is everything allright?'

'Yeah', I said to him 'I just called up everyone, but I couldn't get through one person'.

'Don't worry …', he hugged me tightly 'I think its time for us to have dinner, you haven't been eating anything all day'.

'Okay', I said to him, I had to take care of myself especially during this time because I'm pregnant.

2 days had passed and I was at the airport and some of my friends were already there. I would be going on a separate plane to Japan because Syaoran wanted me in his sight all flight, so he had his private plane to get us there to Japan. Luckily everyone appeared and everyone was going to safe. I sighed deeply and I started writing in my journal. Yesterday, I bought a thick blank journal for myself, I would have to start writing my thoughts in case anything big changed.

The moment we landed to Japan, it wasn't exactly perfect. Somehow Syaoran didn't want me seeing my friends, not yet anyway. I was sent to a car straight to the palace while he had a talk with Makoto, who was holding Aiko tightly by his arms.

Aiko asked him 'How's she doing Syaoran, she sounded so stress when I was talking with her on the phone'.

'She's not doing so well', he said to the concerned Maiko 'I regret rushing her into the whole situation but I really want her to be safe'.

'I understand that Syaoran, I would do the same thing for Aiko', who kissed Aiko softly by the lips.

'I just don't want her seeing her friends right now knowing that they would be wanting answers from her', even though we were in this shocking situation, he always thought of my feelings first 'Its best to keep her from her friends right now … and thank you so much for doing me this big favor, leading her friends to another safe house'.

'Its allright Syaoran', Aiko said to him 'We're here for you no matter what'.

'I'm sorry about the engagement party', Syaoran said before he entered the black car that was waiting for him.

'Hey you know what people always say, its better to be safe … than you know what', she smiled kindly at Syaoran 'Say hi to my sister for me?', Syaoran nodded and he walked in the car and it drove off, while Makoto and Aiko got in the bus along with everyone else, who were mostly Sakura's friends and they got driven to the safe house in the quiet side of Japan.

At the palace, I was waiting patiently, waiting for Syaoran to come home. He didn't come back to the palace with me since he wanted to talk to my sister alone. I saw him walk in the bedroom and I hugged him tightly 'Finally you're here, I was starting to worry about you'.

'No need to worry about me, now I'm just starting to worry about you, you barely smile nowadays'; he smiled softly at me 'You ought to smile now and then you know'.

'I know but I'm just worried you know'.

'So where's Machiko, I don't hear her, that means she's sleeping?'

'She was exhausted the moment we got here', I said to him 'So are we finally safe?'

'Yeah …', I sat down beside him in the chaise, and he hugged me tightly 'Everything's going to be fine from now on, besides you ought to get settled in the palace any way since your going to be crowned Queen soon'.

'Imagine me Queen Sakura Li', I smiled at him, then I giggled 'Mrs. Li, I have to get used to the sound of that'.

'Yeah … and your going to be mine forever', he kissed me in the forehead and I leaned in his arms 'Sakura, just make me one promise, promise to be truly honest to me no matter what and that will keep me happy. I want to be in a marriage based on truth and love'.

'I will I promise', I looked into his eyes and made an unbreakable promise right there. Then he kissed me passionately and I slowly slept in a light slumber, he gently carried me to the bed and he left and headed downstairs. He would have to be talking to other world leaders in the world about what was happening.

At 10.00 pm the next day we left Australia, Sydney was bombed, and right in the City. Luckily I was already asleep but Syaoran was up all night watching the news and he thank god that he got me and my friends and family as soon as possible because it all so happened quickly. The bombing made world news and there was pictures of the effect the bombs had and how many people was injured. Since the people in Australia had no idea it was coming they weren't prepared.

Upstairs I could hear noises of the television, sounds of crashes and it woke me up straight away. I was wondering where Syaoran was so I looked around for him. I was now at a month pregnant and I would have 8 more months to go. My bump wasn't that big yet and I was glad for that since most of my friends didn't even know that I was expecting.

I looked around the palace walking, and I saw some guards in the hallways and I found Syaoran his office and he was watching TV which was on pretty loud, luckily it didn't wake up Machiko, only me. I knocked on his door and he put the TV lower and he asked 'Did I wake you?'

'Yeah …', I looked at him and asked 'What's the news saying?'

'The bombing just happened and its world news', I sat down beside him and I held on his hand tightly as I saw the affects of it 'A lot of people have been severely injured'.

'Oh my god', as the cameras showed a person bleeding and dead bodies on the streets 'They hit the City, and that's the busiest part of town'.

'I know, I can't believe they would do this … those damn terrorists', he started getting angry, thinking about all the innocent lives being lost here for no apparent reason.

'We can't do anything now …', I looked out the window and it was late. Another reason why I woke up in the middle of the night was that I was REALLY HUNGRY, I missed dinner and I only ate a bit of lunch and now I was famished.

Syaoran went to the kitchen with me to keep me company and I knew he was hiding something from me, I could feel this vibe between us, but knowing he was a Prince he would have to keep things from me for the sake of the other countries and I understood that. I smiled at him and said 'Thanks again for making me sandwich, Syao', he sat beside me and he smiled softly.

'Tomo is all right', he said to me, surprisingly. I barely heard Syaoran talk about Tomo and this was the first 'He's in America; he was in America during the bombing happen so he's fine'.

'That's good …', I said to him, I couldn't tell him anything else but that.

'He's coming over in Japan first thing tomorrow', he got up from the chair and he said that to me with his back turned on me 'It seems like he needs to talk to you about something'.

'What do you mean?', I was now confused, what did Tomo want to talk about? Our relationship was over.

'I'm not sure, you ought to talk to him in case its something important …I'm going to bed, I'll see you in the morning?' he kissed me in the cheeks before he left the room and I felt so alone, being alone in the kitchen late at night. Even though I was now married to Syaoran it sure didn't feel like it. After I ate I went back to bed and I slept …

Syaoran woke up early in the morning and even though it was cold he decided to go rowing. He looked at me lying down in bed looking peacefully and he got changed quickly and he went downstairs. He didn't like the fact that Tomo was coming to Japan, he hated being in a love triangle. He got in the boat and started rowing to the lake and it was freezing, but he desperately needed to get away from all this right now …

I woke up to be alone in bed as usual and Syaoran was gone without even telling me what was wrong. It was nearly 11 am, and the maids entered the room opening the blinds and starting up the water for me in the bath-tub. I said 'Thank you', to them and they shut the door close. I started stripping off my clothes and got in the warm water. I closed my eyes and thought about what had been happening and maybe I should do something for Syaoran to keep him happy. I felt like one of those wives with unhappy husbands, but I knew I couldn't blame myself. This marriage was rushed because of the terrorist attacks. I heard the door open and Syaoran came back, he went in the bathroom and I asked him 'Is everything allright?'

He nodded and said 'I'm fine Sakura no need to worry about me … look I don't think I can stand being around Tomo for the whole day. I'm going to visit the others and see how they are doing all right?'

'But Syaoran, I want you to stay …'

'I really can't …I'm sorry Sakura'.

'Syao please I'm begging you just do me this one favor and I'll be so happy … I don't want to be alone with him you know'.

'Okay, but I'm only doing this for you nothing more', I smiled at him and I got out of the bath tub and I kissed him softly in the lips. I was glad Syao was easy to persuade. Luckily I had clothes with me already so I didn't have to go out and shop but for the rest of the day, Syaoran showed me his secret spot and he rowed me there. It was cold but I covered myself with so many layers of clothing.

Syaoran said to me 'I hope we have a boy when the baby is born'.

'What if it isn't? Would it make that big difference to you?'

'No not really but I've always wanted a baby boy … you know teaching a boy to ride his bike and stuff like that'.

'Yeah I can imagine you doing that, your going to be such a great father Syaoran', hugging him tightly 'We're going to be one great family'.

'Yeah, you as a mother, I really regretted the fact that I wasn't there for you when you had Machiko. I feel like I'm going to be a not good enough father you know?'

'Don't worry you have the rest of you life to make it up to her. Its only been 5 years'.

'Yeah your right, and I too want to make it up to you for letting you through all that pain. I loved you but I guess I was too chicken to tell you how I really felt in the first place'.

'Don't worry Syaoran, as long as we're together I'm happy'.

When we got back to the palace, I quickly got changed in a dress and Syaoran dressed up semi-formal, tonight was going to be a formal dinner. The maid came in the room and told me 'Madam, Tomo had arrived, and he brought a girl with him'

'A girl?' I asked, shocked that Tomo was with a girl in the first place. I never thought he would actually move on but I obviously thought wrong. I felt weird inside, then a flashback of memories of the times me and Tomo spent time together … by my penthouse making love all day. He was not the same anymore. Tomo was growing into a man.

'Yeah and she looks like she's expecting soon?'

'Soon?'

'Madam, they are waiting downstairs, dinner will be served soon'.

'Okay thanks, Nolee', she closed the door and I started getting changed. Syaoran was already downstairs, but knowing him he wasn't going to be entertaining the guests, so I quickly got changed then I rushed downstairs. Nolee was right, this girl with Tomo was expecting.

Tomo walked over to me and hugged me tightly and there was this awkward feeling between us two 'Sakura its great to see you again, I'm glad you weren't busy for today …', I looked at the girl making me wonder who was she 'Oh, this beautiful girl is Minami Jasons, I met her in Hollywood at a party'.

The girl stepped forward towards me and I shook her hand 'Its nice to meet you Minami'.

'It's also great to see you Mrs. Li, it's a pleasure meeting you after Tomo couldn't stop talking about you', she was cute and she was also around Tomo's age which was good. Luckily Syaoran broke the silence by coming in the room and thank god for that.

He walked over to me and kissed me and whispered to me 'They're here'.

'Syaoran this is Minami Jasons, she's -?'

'We're not engaged or anything, I'm way to young for that', said Tomo. But now I was confused what their relationship was 'Minami is my long time girlfriend'.

'Long time girlfriend?', I repeated those words.

There was something weird about Minami, maybe because it was the fact that she was terribly quiet, so during dinner I asked her questions to make her talk. I felt that she probably thought I was looking down at her for being pregnant, but I wasn't. Its just that their relationship really didn't make sense, it was odd. While Tomo was visiting Machiko to give her something, I asked Minami to take a walk with me, 'Tomo you don't mind if I take Minami for a walk right?'

'No not at all', he smiled at me and Minami.

While we were taking a walk through the halls of the palace, I asked her 'How pregnant are you Minami?'

'You can call me Mina if you want and I'm 6 months pregnant', she smiled at me, though I knew she felt awkward around me.

'So you and Tomo have been together for how long now?'

'6 months'.

'So you mean to say you got pregnant when you first slept together?'

'It's not his child', I was shocked by his confession.

'What do you mean he is not the father, does he know that?'

'Yeah he knows, and he loves me too much as a friend to let me go through this alone. For now, he wants everyone to think its his child and he's willing to support me', I took in everything she was saying but it was hard to believe all that.

'So how long have you known him?'

'We've been close friends ever since we were little kids, if you want to know who got me pregnant your free to ask me'.

'So who did?', I asked her softly but at the same time being sympathetic.

'His best friend Saburo, then when Saburo found out he was pregnant he clearly told me that he didn't want the baby and he wasn't going to be helping me in anyway. Sakura you are really lucky to have Tomo as a friend, he's amazing and he does amazing things for people'.

'I know he's amazing, I was with him and I felt complete for the first time in my life after my fiancée died, but I knew we couldn't, there's just something about Tomo that …'

'I know what you mean, I fell in love with him, and I told him my feelings and he heard me out and he just …oh I lost track of time. I should start going with Tomo, thank you for having me as a guest in your house'.

'No thank you, and good luck'.

'You too'

'You know I'm pregnant?'

'Yeah you know I was like that once your going to love it'.

'I know I will', I smiled.

3 months later

Aiko and Makoto got married in a private ceremony in Japan and it was beautiful. It was spring and the weather was perfect. Everything was beautiful and that day, my friends and family knew that I was pregnant. Everyone was happy that day including me. That time everyone in the party got in this group photo including all the people important in my life. Tomo was still in Japan and he had managed to make it there but Mina couldn't make it, she was back in America, and she just got in labor just then, and she had a baby boy which she named Yori. I was going to be a godmother for Yori and I was glad.

Straight after my sister's wedding, Yuki and Takara got married, Haruko Toyo got married to her long time boyfriend Goro.

A couple of weeks after that Daisuke married Kenta Sujoui. Straight after the wedding of Daisuke Yuudai married Umeko.

8 ½ months have passed and it was just great for everyone. I was soon to give birth to my son Kichiro Kyo Li. Lately I haven't been in good health but I wasn't telling anyone about it because if I told Syaoran it would just him worry and I didn't want that right now. I was just keeping quiet.

Tonight nothing much was happening, Syaoran was out at a party for Royalties and I decided not to go with him, and I was sitting by the gazebo at the back of the palace, by the gardens looking at the stars, this was now a peaceful moment and I just looked at it. Suddenly pain struck my lower body and the pain was strong and I wondered what was going on, I screamed for Nolee 'Nolee! Help!', but no-one was coming out because it was late. I screamed in pain bringing me down since it was so painful.

Suddenly one of the gardeners the was about to leave heard me screaming for help and he instantly came for me, Joseph was the gardener at night and he helped me up then he ran into the palace and called for Nolee. I shut my eyes tight since the pain was unbearable, Nolee came out of the palace and helped Joseph carry me, I said to her 'I'm having the baby now Nolee, I can't take it'.

'Okay –', she called for a doctor and Joseph carefully took me upstairs.

I was left in the room alone for a second and I knew having this baby was going to be big and it wasn't like my first birth. It wasn't going to be the same. Nolee came in with towels to help me cool down since my skin felt scorching hot for no reason, she said to me 'I couldn't contact Syaoran, he's out of range'.

'Okay, I'm sure he's coming soon though', but I didn't know how wrong I was. After 5 minutes my doctor came and he helped me deliver the baby. I was draining out of energy fast, though I pushed hard as I was suppose to. I heard the baby's cries and I smiled, then I started getting weak fast, then everything just blacked out.

As soon as I passed out, Dr. Jacobs called out for help from Nolee and Joseph. 'Nolee call an ambulance at once Mrs. Li is unconscious and I don't know why!'

Nolee panicked looking at the unconscious body on the bed then she went to the phone and dialed for an ambulance, she couldn't believe this was happening and especially when Syaoran wasn't around.

Dr. Jacobs 'She just passed out after the baby came out … oh god, this is terrible'.

'Is there a chance for her to wake up?'

'I don't think so …'.

Downstairs Syaoran just came back having no idea what had been happening lately and he went upstairs as usual, and when he opened the door, he found a Doctor and he looked at the bed and there was Sakura in the bed unconscious and there was blood all over the bed. 'What happened?', rushing over to Sakura's side.

'She's unconscious, she just gave out after the baby boy came out …'

'What do you mean?'

Dr. Jacobs said to poor Syaoran 'An ambulance is coming sir, but I don't think there's a big chance of your dear wife surviving …'

'When did all this started?'

Joseph stepped forward and said 'I found her in pain by the gazebo and she didn't look like she was in labour she was just in pain'.

'She never told me anything about her feeling pain … Oh god, where the hell is the ambulance?'

The ambulance staff came in taking the body of Sakura and was brought to the car, Syaoran entered the car and he held her hand tightly and prayed for her _'Please God please let her be alive still, I love her too much to lose her'._

As soon as the ambulance got to the hospital, she was rushed to the Emergency Room to try and get her to have a pulse and the doctors were rushing in the ER doing everything they could do to save the Queen. Outside was Syaoran freaking the hell out because he didn't know what was going on and he wanted to. Syaoran paced around the waiting room, waiting till someone came out and told him what happened. Suddenly Dr. Jacobs came out of the ER and he looked at Syaoran disappointedly then Syao knew that she wasn't alive anymore, first he got angry from shock then he ran out of the hospital because he couldn't take this. He took a taxi to the a lake and he looked at the lake early that morning since he had been up all night. He looked at the lake and how calm it was then warm tears started dropping down his face. He had lost Sakura forever and its all his fault, and he wasn't even there for her.

'_I wasn't even there for her when she was in pain and I didn't notice the fact that she was in pain. She didn't trust me or didn't want me to worry about it …I can't believe this, Sakura'._

His phone rang but he missed it, right now he didn't want to be disturbed and he sure didn't feel like talking to anyone.

What was he going to do now? Right now he had two choices, he could run away from this, run away from the life that Sakura built for him or take care of the kids alone, he knew he couldn't remarry again not ever because NO-ONE would ever replace her.

Pls review,

I'm making a new story too.


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